My mind races.
There are reasons: advancing age, caffeine, daily deadlines, parenthood.
For me, the only way to get a grip is a technique I call the mental freeze-frame.
Here’s how it works. By focusing on gratitude, I can temporarily stop my worries in their tracks. I can even step outside myself and do a quick self-appraisal.
In just the past week, I can think of three examples.
On Monday, I took a sick day from work. I had the kind of stomach virus that hurts your feelings. I was so sick that I threw my back out being sick.
Mercifully, I finally went to sleep after about 24 hours of this wretchedness. After a few hours of sleep, I woke at 4 a.m. and realized that my stomach had settled. Not only that, but the bedroom was cool, my bed was soft and a gentle rain was falling on the windowsill.
Most importantly, the alarm clock wouldn’t sound for another 90 minutes. ... Bliss. There is a point after a stomach virus that you can simply luxuriate in feeling normal.
Most of my grateful moments involve my children.
On the day I was sick, my wife said my 6-year-old son was worried about his dad. I watched him out our dining room window as he picked up Times Free Press newspaper inserts scattered in our backyard by a windstorm. I had left the newspaper outside the night before, and this was my son’s way of doing something nice for me.
As I watched, his brown hair was whipping in the fierce dusk wind. He looked handsome in his school uniform, yellow sweater and khaki pants.
Watching your kids develop character and empathy may be the greatest gift of parenthood. Sitting silently, watching my oldest son’s arms fill with newspapers was a transcendent moment.
When he walked through the back door later I hugged him tightly.
“I love you, Dad,” he said. “I hope you feel better.”
I thought, “There are no bad days with you in the world, little boy.”
Our 15-month-old son, meanwhile, is bonding with Dad, too. Mornings are our quality time together.
After Mom and big brother take off for school, we have about an hour each morning together. On Tuesday morning our toddler was fitful. Still sleepy, I surmised.
I scooped him up in his little spaceman pajamas. I felt his head relax in the bend of my arm as I massaged his little socked feet, square and warm.
We watched television together. Every 30 seconds he would turn his head and look me in the eyes. I could see the corners of his smile under his pacifier and a flash of dimples.
I kissed him on the forehead.
“More,” he signaled in sign language.
So, I kissed him again.
Kennedy is the content editor of the Times Free Press Life sections and writes the “Life Stories” column. Previously, he was the first Sunday editor of the Times Free Press. Before Chattanooga’s newspapers were merged in 1999, Kennedy was the coordinating editor of the Chattanooga Times, where he had previously been an education reporter, feature writer and team leader. His first newspaper job was as sports editor of the Cleveland (Tenn.) Daily Banner. Kennedy’s human ...
