Wastewater Treatment

Hey, now the TN River is craptastic!

That fancy new boat down town can now sell "Turd Tour" tickets!

The new city marketing slogan, "Urine Chattanooga now!"

For our friends near that creek at the entrance to the River Gorge, ya'll have now achieved Suck Cess!

That's it, I'm pooped out.

While ScottyM has many excellent ideas, let's expand the list!

Go fishing for Littlefield Brown Trout and City Council Sewage Suckers. Enjoy the Trail of Tissues and Condom Falls.

While picnicking on the river, be sure and look for Corny, the Mysterious Moccasin Bend Manure Mascot (a Waterhouse P.R. Production) and his invisible pal Gassy, who is never seen but often sensed.

Take precautions though, as Sassquat remains have been found near the pumping station at the Littlefield Memorial Latrine, another crown jewel for Chattanooga.

What's also exciting is this year's Head of the Hooch will be an obstacle course. Typhoid and tetanus shots provided for participants by Chattanooga's Erlanger Hospital(for the reasonable price of 46 million to cover the last three year's losses).

The Chamber has a new slogan for 2010, "Chattanooga Can Doody It!"

It's great to have a City Government that cares. Brings a tear to your eyes, doesn't it?

For such a scatalogical subject, Clay's art on this one is superb. I think the man may be a first rate watercolorist as well.

Scotty, "Urine in Chattanooga now!" is perfect and my sentiments exactly. I keep thinking of the summer there 'on the lake' with all the folks and their kids splashing in the water, happily...oh, what a visual

harry wrote,

"Corny, the Mysterious Moccasin Bend Manure Mascot"

Now that is talent.

I'm speechless.

canary,

"scatalogical" LOL

I find this to be too crappy a subject to wade into...literally.

Well, well, I had always wondered where the "Tidy Bowl Man" retired to. But, may I suggest a supply of those little 'thingies' you might hang around the shoreline. They say it would turn the water blue for a few weeks at a time and won't leave an unsightly 'ring-around-the-shore'. Just wonderin'.

Doo-dah, doo-dah day, Woody

Groan! to all.

My grandkids love potty humor,but a fetid river is no laughing matter. Maybe we laugh because we don't want to cry.

Think Georgia will want our water now???

Oh Boy!

I was going to write another vacuous poem but the submissions here are more than adequate.

I mourn for the Mississippi, Colorado, Snake, Tennessee, Potomac,Shenendoah, James, Hudson, Chesapeake, and all the other streams and lakes that suffer.

The lake I live nearby was pristine 50 years ago. We now have the signs up all over, after about 50 years...DON'T EAT THE LARGER FISH MORE THAN ONCE A MONTH.

The ACOE, hasn't been able to control it.

The Bahamas pristine shores are littered with oil sludge and dumpings that get deposited as the Gulf Stream, born in the Gulf of Mexico, and fed by the Mississippi wends it's way through the Caribbean and Atlantic oceans.

What was the name of the river that caught fire? Was it near Cleveland or Cincinnati?

Genius, absolute genius scott! I'm afraid if I commented on the sewage dissaster it would only piss people off. Then the s#!t would hit the fan.

Nucanuk wrote: "My grandkids love potty humor,but a fetid river is no laughing matter. Maybe we laugh because we don't want to cry."

It's not that we're laughing as much as pointing out the hypocrisy and total mismanagement by the inept government in power. That includes the mayor, city council, political appointees and costly political patronage payback (see the Arts, Education, and Cultural Office)questionable art (payed for with taxpayer's money), and the rest of the toadies that exist only to suck money from the public teat.

Remember, this group of hacks, crumb-bums, and do-nothings (except to line their pockets with taxpayer's money)are in charge of Chattanooga's Homeland Security.

Now if they can't figure out that a power failure at a sewage pumping station will dump millions of gallons of sewage into the Tennessee River, what good are they? Do you feel safe with such idiots running the show?

The city government deserves a one-finger salute.

Fight organized crime--Re-elect no one!

Clara - Cuyahoga

Clara's 11:05 post reminds me of an old Biblical proverb/prophecy regarding the end times that outlines how humans globally will be drinking (or not being able to) the filth of their waterways and oceans, which will make them sick and kill many. It's a bitter justice that we do eventually reap what we sow, in this case, e.coli, in other cases, increased cancers in our populations.

I have to admit, harrystatel's post is a timely parody of our present political/social situation. A tragi-comedy for sure.

The idea that society collects and concentrates undesirables into one location is the problem. One family's refuse isn't a problem. 50,000 families' refuse becoming a point source is stupid.

Anonymight wrote: "The idea that society collects and concentrates undesirables into one location is the problem."

In Chattanooga we call it City Hall.