I wasn't expecting a deep discussion when I had some guy friends over for dinner a few days ago, but I guess I should know by now to expect the unexpected.
While perusing my book collection, one of my friends came upon an interesting title: "Undateable: 311 Things Guys Do That Guarantee They Won't Be Dating or Having Sex."
I didn't write it, but I sure wish I did. I just bought it to help the economy and with the hope that one day it would inspire a column.
If you're not familiar with this little tome (which is highly entertaining and informative), it details things men do that ... well ... they just shouldn't. Like wear "japris" (capris jeans). Universally bad.
No the authors aren't evil, man haters. They just want to let men know about the things don't like. Really, these ladies just want to help. Because the appearance of the dreaded pleated pants, or having no plan for a date, have killed many a promising romance.
Anyway, my friends started thumbing through it and pointing out each other's heinous sins -- owning cats, rocking a mandana (but only during workouts!), wearing Crocs, etc.
Even though these guys engaged in some style misdemeanors, I would never consider any of them undateable. They're all attractive, well-spoken, smart and really cool, stand-up guys. Really. The other day I saw them help a group of total lady strangers by voluntarily moving a heavy, granite-topped table, so the ladies would have more room to sit together. True story.
The point is, women are actually a lot more forgiving of men's various foibles than we often get credit for.
For every man out there rocking a faux fur vest and drinking a Cosmo, there's a woman who loves him because he's a good guy. Yes, he's a good guy who likes girly drinks, but the fact remains that he's a good guy. And good almost always triumphs over undateable.
So if you really want to know what the women in your life won't tell you, go buy the book. It's hilarious, and you'll learn something. And, if you're not a big reader, it does have pictures. Though they don't pop up. Sorry.
If you want to get away with committing a multitude of "undateable" sins while still getting the girl, be a really good guy and treat your girl right. Just say no to road rage, undertipping, mesh clothing, those kooky Bill Cosby sweaters and any shoe with Velcro closures.
Gina Bever is a local public relations professional and woman-about-town. She's known for providing her friends -- male and female -- with thousands of hours of free therapy and (asked for) relationship advice.
ASK GINA: Send questions about relationships to Gina at malecall@timesfree press.com.