LISA DENTON: Hey, Barry, want to play along with my Easter joke? It goes: What's the difference between the Easter Bunny and a mattababy?
And you say ...
BARRY COURTER: What's a mattababy?
LISA: And I say: Nothing, honey, what's a matta with you?
And then, of course, I have to apologize because I know how you hate puns.
BARRY: Hate seems like such a strong word, especially during the Easter season, but they aren't eggs-actly my favorite thing. I do like Easter, though. Did I ever tell you about the time I got a mesh tank top in my basket? The whole family went to play golf that day, and it was a gorgeous, sunny spring day. When we got home, my torso looked like a big strawberry with lots of seeds, only with the colors reversed.
Then there was the time our dog went behind my parents and found every colored hardboiled egg they'd hidden around the house. He didn't like any of them. Tried them all, though.
LISA: When my kids and niece were little, they used to insist on hiding the eggs for the adults after they finished their hunt. They never wanted to share their candy, though. Coincidentally, that's how our big Easter tug-of-war tradition got started.
With Easter coming up this weekend, there are lots of egg hunts around town, including another helicopter egg drop, this one at Church of the Highlands in Harrison on Saturday. And Dynamic Church is having a second Hunt To Can Hunger at the Hamilton Family YMCA on Friday to collect food for The Salvation Army. And the folks at Stuart Heights Baptist Church will put out 100,000 eggs at Coolidge Park on Sunday for kids to hunt after the outdoor church service.
I can tell you're getting egg-cited.
BARRY: I demand a count of every one of those eggs. Those poor chickens must be tired.
There are a whole bunch of other Easter-related events, so I hope people will go to ChattanoogaNow.com to find them.
And, if hunting for eggs isn't your thing, Saturday is Record Store Day. I need some new/old vinyl for my collection. By the way, when is National Silly Columnist Day?
LISA: Uh, every Monday?
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Contact Lisa Denton at email@example.com or 423-757-6281. Contact Barry Courter at firstname.lastname@example.org or 423-757-6354.