BARRY COURTER: Lisa, I was confused at seeing you doing calisthenics the other day, but then I saw the calendar. You're prepping for the World's Longest Yard Sale coming up this week, aren't you? Remember to carbo-load the night before, drink lots of fluids and pace yourself.
LISA DENTON: Hey, I got this. I went pro years ago. A Hardee's biscuit for breakfast and I'm good to go. I'm especially happy that the yard sale and Tennessee's tax-free weekend didn't coincide this year. That leaves plenty of time to drive Highway 127 Thursday through Sunday, looking for bargains. Not that I need another dough roller, but sometimes they just call out my name. Fudge brownies have that effect on me, too. Can't resist.
I'm afraid it does conflict with the Steampunk Expo & Gothic Convention, which is also this weekend at the Chattanooga Choo Choo. That sounds ... interesting.
BARRY: Maybe you can find someone up in the Dayton area willing to part with their knee-high leather boots, bustier and vintage aviation goggles to wear to the convention. I'm assuming, of course, you don't already have such an outfit.
LISA: Actually, thanks to previous yard sales, I have all of those. What I really wish I could find is a steampunk dress like one featured on an episode of "Project Runway: Under the Gunn" last year. It had pulleys at the hips so you could raise and lower the skirt. How handy would that be? For so many things.
BARRY: That's genius. I, unfortunately, mixed my Gothic outfit with my goth one in the wash, and now when I wear either I look like Doctor Doolittle mated with Adam Ant then got caught in the crossfire of a paintball fight.
LISA: That sounds frightening, actually.
BARRY: Nonetheless, we should also mention that this week's Nightfall act is Fredericks Brown. Half of the singing duo is Deva Mahal, daughter of blues great Taj Mahal. Fredericks is his real last name. Comparing artists to one another is not fair, but she and Steph Brown sound like Adele doing the Blind Boys of Alabama. It's a pretty great combination.
LISA: It's hard to be disappointed with any Nightfall act. Even the ones I'm unfamiliar with usually turn out to be great entertainers. And it's hard to argue with free, too. That's Friday night at Miller Plaza. Then Saturday night at Riverfront Nights is a free concert by alternative country band Rosco Bandana. I think I'll suggest that as a name when my grandson is born.
BARRY: It's a good name ... for a chocolate lab. It's a good band name, too. They're a seven-piece country/rock group with two female vocalists and a male lead singer/guitar player. They're good.
LISA: And don't forget that Little Royal will be at Mocha Restaurant & Music Lounge for two shows Saturday. He's said to be James Brown's half-brother. He does bear a resemblance to the late "Godfather of Soul" and toured with the Swingmasters in the 1960s and '70s and had hits with "Jealous" and "Razor Blade."
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Contact Barry Courter at firstname.lastname@example.org or 423-757-6354. Contact Lisa Denton at email@example.com or 423-757-6281.