DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been together for 10 years and have four children. Two years ago, we went through a rough patch and separated. After working through our problems, we moved back in together recently.
Over the last few months, I have noticed that I become depressed whenever he's around. It's nothing he does. He's nice and has improved himself over the last two years, but I miss living without him. I wish we would get a divorce so I could go back to living with just my children.
Do I feel this way because of low self-esteem, or is it something else? I'm not sure what to make of it, and your advice would be greatly appreciated. — SECOND THOUGHTS IN OHIO
DEAR SECOND THOUGHTS: It appears that although you and your husband worked through your problems enough to move back together, there's still more work to be done to repair your relationship.
Be careful what you wish for. Whether your attraction to him has simply grown stale or you have fallen completely out of love with him, I can't guess. But with four children in the picture, I hope you will schedule some sessions with a licensed marriage counselor before making any final decisions about making that wish of yours come true.
DEAR ABBY: I'm a 911 dispatcher and I am shocked by the abuse of the 911 system. We are here to help in times of emergency, but our lines are continuously tied up by people who don't have one. PLEASE help by passing along this plea to your readers:
1. Please don't call to ask for phone numbers; we are not Information.
2. If you are on a speakerphone or shouting, WE CAN'T HEAR YOU CLEARLY! We know you are upset, but we can't help if we can't understand where you are or what type of assistance you need.
3. Do not assume that our computers can pick up your location. We can get an idea of where you are, but there is no guarantee that the information is accurate.
4. Every question we ask is important. You may not think so, but we wouldn't ask if the information was not vital.
5. And please, don't call us asking for directions or the time!
DEAR 911 DISPATCHER: I'm printing your letter because it boggles my mind that anyone would be so stupid or inconsiderate as to deliberately call the emergency phone number asking for directions or the time. It is my understanding that some of the 911 systems are antiquated, and too many calls can tie them up, leaving someone with a real emergency unable to get through. In times like that, minutes can be critical. Perhaps the problem would be solved if callers who did not have a true emergency were fined for doing so — since I'm sure you have the number from which the call was placed.
A dispatcher's job is to keep our responders and the public safe. When our lines are tied up by people who abuse the system, we are unable to help those in dire need of our help. We spend our days dealing with high-stress situations, and we do our best to guarantee a safe outcome for everyone involved. Please respect the 911 emergency system and call only for true emergencies. — 911 DISPATCHER
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.