The Wall Street Journal published a report this week under the headline: "An Escape to the Dentist: Parents Confess Their Secret Ways To Get Alone Time." The piece was written by Sue Shellenbarger, a WSJ Work & Family columnist.
It was filled with testimonials from working parents on all the little ways they carve out time to decompress from family life. As suggested in the title, one busy dad booked extra dental cleanings because he enjoys the 45-minute, laid-back respites. Not sure I'd consider a mouth full of sharp objects and suction hoses relaxing, but I get the idea.
It made me think of all the ways I've used to escape the joyful chaos of family life over the years. Introverted and single until my late 30s, I have always craved periods of quiet solitude.
Mark KennedyView other columns by Mark Kennedy
Here are some of my tried-and-true getaway strategies.
» Porch sitting. Our house has three entrances: front door, garage door and back door. Like a lot of suburbanites, I suspect, our front door is by far the least-used portal. The informal entrances get all the traffic.
This is important because it means I can basically hide in plain sight on the front porch with a magazine, and nobody is likely to follow me out there.
I'm only likely to look up to give a nod and howdy to passing joggers, who are typically wearing ear buds and noncommittal expressions.
» Dog walking. I'm not sure why they call it dog- walking, because it usually is more about standing still as your dog connects the dots between investigatory smells.
I find it fascinating to watch our poodle-spaniel mix, Boise, check out smells through the rabbit warren of cul-de-sacs in our neighborhood. He's even got favorite sniffing spots in the middle of the street, which makes me wonder if there is something buried under the asphalt with an interesting scent.
I'm no vet, but I get the feeling this is therapy for Boise and improves his mental health.
» Lawn mowing. Going back to boyhood, I've always used lawn mowing as an escape. There's something about the hum of a Briggs & Stratton four-cycle mower engine that puts me at ease. Pushing a mower - I've never had a lawn tractor - is conducive to day-dreaming.
Lately, I've been wondering about the voles who live in our lawn. To them, does a hosta taste like a chef's salad? Do they go on blind dates with voles from other tunnels?
» Car washing. It's not playing in soapy water that I rind relaxing; it's the detailing that warms my heart. Brushing the air vents with an old toothbrush or restoring the original paint luster with carnauba wax calms my nerves.
Part of this, I think, is that these are bend-over tasks that work like a forward fold in yoga, a head rush followed by a feeling of calm as the blood drains from your head back to your torso.
» Outdoor cooking. I do most of the barbecue cooking at our house, and it's usually a solitary task with me sitting on the back patio twirling a spatula. There's something comforting about the sound and smell of meat cooking and something relaxing about the repetitive turning and basting.
It's one of those tasks that occupies only about 10 percent of your brain and leaves the other 90 percent free for daydreaming.
» Solo moviegoing. I know most people think of moviegoing as a social outing, but sometimes I prefer to go by myself. It's a more immersive experience if you are focused 100 percent on the filmmakers' art.
Plus, you don't have to share your popcorn.
Contact Mark Kennedy at mkennedy@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6645.