Let's get to it. From the "Soon TBA Studios," here we go...
This April 16, 2011, file photo shows Sebastian the Ibis, the Miami Hurricanes' mascot, leading the team on to the field for a spring NCAA college football game, at Lockhart Stadium in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. Convicted Ponzi schemer Nevin Shapiro told Yahoo! Sports he provided extra benefits to 72 football players and other athletes at Miami from 2002 to 2010. His claims involve several current players, but coach Al Golden said it was too soon to take disciplinary action. (AP Photo/Jeffrey M. Boan, FIle)Miami aftershocks
Truthfully, what would it take to surprise you about the Miami football program this morning? Seriously, is there anything that could come out today that could make any non-UM fan go, "Wow, it wasn't really that bad until __ happened?"
As P-Davi noted Wednesday, these types of stories almost never stop after the first wave. There will be more. There always is. Of that you can be assured.
The questions this morning are what happens to Miami and how/if college football can be fixed?
And please do not quote that ESPN talking-head round table panel discussion with everyone up there debating the bastion of ethics and morality that is college football from the bastion of ethics and morality that is the ESPN campus. (And if you think we're being sarcastic there, well, you're right.)
The more we've thought about the hard-to-believe-and-even-harder-to-turn-away-from details of the Miami scandal, the more we think the death penalty could be an option. Seriously, is the NCAA going to wait for something "bigger" and/or more "scandalous" than this Hurricane that includes a convicted felon saying he provided cash and gifts and women and even an abortion for players and recruits with said felon claiming that coaches and school officials knew of this as it was happening?
As for fixing the system, it's going to take a room full of smart guys and gals that do not have a vested interest in the ATM that is modern-day college football. High on the list of steps, though, has to be re-writting the rules that include clear and distinct punishments.
Let's not be overly concerned about text messages that occur on the wrong day of the week, and let's do everything possible so the Nevin (R. Johnson) Shapiros of the world are eradicated from the game.
And while we're here, there needs to be a gold circle of NCAA violations (call it the Tressell level if you want), that if violated are paramount to taking a career Hari-kari. And that's for the coach, the booster, the player... for anyone that broke the Tressell level rule.
Something tells us it's going to get worse before it gets better.
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Who answered the phone in the 19th hole?
Fred Couples may have had a few 12-packs too many when he was asked by by reporters Wednesday about Tiger Woods' chances of making the Presidents Cup team, the collection of Americans that face a team of international players. Couples is the captain of the American team and has two at-large picks - and he has long been in favor of adding Woods, who has been in a complete tailspin.
"I really want him on the team based on my opinion that he's been the best player for 10 straight years," Couples told reporters Wednesday during a news conference. "I don't think you can push him down because he's not playing maybe as well as 20 other guys that could be picked."
Uh, Freddy, that's exactly how it happens. This isn't the Celebrity Skins game, pick the best players right now. If you get yo pick Tiger circa 2007, OK, we're with you. But Tiger circe 2011, not so much.
Couples did add that he wanted Woods to play in at least one more tournament between now and the Australian Open leading up to the Presidents Cup. That could be doable - hey, our regular Saturday game has a tournament "feel" and Tiger's invited (well, as long as the Mrs. 5-at-10 doesn't find out, that is) - but please notice that Couples didn't say he had to play "well."
C'mon, Fred.
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The Bandit's in trouble
According to an Associated Press report, Merrill Lynch Credit Corp. has filed a lawsuit in Martin County in an effort to foreclose on Burt Reynolds' Florida home so it can collect about $1.2 million for a mortgage.
Merrill Lynch Credit Corp. named Reynolds, BankAtlantic and Great Eastern Mortgage in the suit and there has not been a mortgage payment since Sept. 1, 2010, on the 12,500-square-foot house.
According to reports, the 75-year-old Reynolds tried to sell the home in 2009 for almost $9 million (it has been appraised for $2.4 million). Reynolds said in a statement through his publicist Wednesday that he was surprised by the lawsuit.
For some of us (We're a Man! We're 40!) there was a time that Reynolds was the coolest guy on the planet and possibly the biggest star around. Seriously. At the Smokey and the Bandit apex, Reynolds was a bona fide A-plus list star.
(And for those of you wondering how this has anything to do with sports, well, Reynolds did play football at Florida State. And he was the quarterback of the Mean Machine in "The Longest Yard." So there you go.)
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This and that
- Sometimes sports can drive you crazy, you know? Not 24 hours ago we were praising these Braves. This morning, after a 7-5 loss to the Giants, we're wondering if there's going to be enough room in the bullpen for Derek Lowe and Jair Jurrjens, who has struggled mightily in the last month. (OK, we're kidding JJ going to the 'pen, but his struggles are certainly noteworthy. Since the all-star break, Jurrjens is 0-2 and has allowed 21 earned runs in 34 innings and that's with a trip to the DL to rest his sore arm.)
- Well, Danny Sheridan's appearance on Paul Finebaum's radio show revealed nothing. No information. No name of the alleged bagman that paid off Cam Newton. No nothing. And no way to get that wasted hour of our lives back listening to that blowhard. Both of them.
- Danica Patrick will run a full-time Nationwide schedule next year. Great. Here's an early tip of 5-at-10 tam o'shanter for her impressive string of 12th-place finishes and belly-aching. We can hardly wait.
- Programming note: We're planning on being on "The Show" with Chris Goforth on AM 1370 today around 2.
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Today's question
If you could get one free shot, one free swing and punch someone in the face, who gets the nod?
That's right, you get a freebie without repercussion. So who was the first person that came to mind?
That guy in the TV commercial who missed the text message about the Flash Mob moving back 30 minutes is among our leaders in the clubhouse. Seriously.