5 at 10: Friday mailbag

There's a bunch of sports going on, but it's Friday and that means mailbag. This may be the best top-to-bottom mailbag we've ever had.

From the "7-Up Stinks Studios," here we go...

From Oso,

photo As an ccomplished wiffle ball player, former President Bush would have made his name at the TFP Wiffle Ball World Series Championship Game had it not been for a successful political career. (AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais)

It's the TFP Wiffle Ball World Series Championship Game and the sports team (The Bruisers) is down to the local news team (The Browns) by 3 runs. It's the bottom of the ninth with bases loaded and coming up to bat is the big, bad Cinco who's gone 0-3 for the day. So this is it. You get to choose one song, that one song that's gonna deliver, that's gonna motivate you to destroy the ball and win the game for the Sport's staff. What's the song of choice that the Cinco A Laz Diaz chooses to enter the batter's box with? Are you more of a "Crazy Train" kinda guy or a "Thunderstruck" man? I'll hang up and listen to your answer. World-class question. Top-notch. And this answer will be repeated in Friday's mailbag, we just wanted to share on the front end because the question was that good.

Oso,

First off, there's no way, we're 0-for-3. No way. We mash whiffle balls. Seriously. We're the last-month-of-Dan-Uggla when it comes to whiffle balls.

That said, this is a great question. Simply outstanding.

No doubt it's "Lunatic Fringe" by Red Rider off the "Vision Quest" soundtrack. That song is so money as an intro. In fact, it was the first thing that popped into our head when we read your question and it made the hair on our arms stand up.

We tried to kick around some other top-notch options ("Welcome to the Jungle," any number of Crue tunes, a couple of rap options, even "I'm Bad," by LL, and a couple of off-the-board ideas like "Twilight Zone" by Golden Earring) but we kept coming back to "Lunatic Fringe."

That said, and because we're the 5-at-10 and we over-think everything, here are the top five and the bottom five (and yes, this was the question we spent entirely too much time on this week, although it was a close call):

Sidenote: "In the Air Tonight" or "Enter Sandman" or "Eye of the Tiger" and the "Rocky" theme were eliminated because they are pretty common choices. Great choices certainly, but all-too-frequent for a moment such as the one Oso described.

Top 5

- "Lunatic Fringe" by Red Rider

- The instrumental music when Roy Hobbs goes yard in "The Natural"

- "Welcome to the Jungle" by GnR

- If we get to take our time so we can get to the middle/back end of the song, we'll add "Home Sweet Home" by Motley Crue; if we are going to the plate quickly, we'll take the gong intro to "Hell's Bells" by AC/DC

- "All I do is Win" by DJ Khaled

Bottom 5

- "I Believe Children are the Future," by Whitney and perfected by Randy Watson in "Coming to America"

- "Sittin' by the Dock of the Bay," by Otis Redding - great song, but not in this moment

- "Aqualung," Ron Burgandy's jazz flute version

- "Here comes the Bride" by everyone

- Anything by Culture Club or Wham for obvious reasons. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

From Celtic-Vol

photo Florida State's Deion Sanders listens on the phone as he waits for the announcement April 23, 1989 of his selection in the upcoming NFL draft at the Winnetka, Illinois home of his agent. Sanders was selected by the Atlanta Falcons. (AP Photo)

Hello 5@10,

Did you happen to catch the Hall of Fame speech by Deion Sanders over the weekend? I don't think there has ever been a more exciting player to watch than Prime Time. From the do rag to the high stepping to the water stunt pulled on Tim McCarver. In honor of Deion, who are your top 5 show-boaters of all-time?

CelticVol,

Another great question. It appears we're list-tastic today, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Sanders' speech was awesome in its awesomeness.

Let's give the showboaters a quick top 5 and some honorable mentions. Deal? Deal.

Sidenote No. 1: Today's ego-crazed and keeping-up-with-the-joneses NFL wide receivers do not count. That's not showboating, that's narcissism. That means T.O. and Ochocinco and the rest of the guys scrambling for props and the next million youtube hits are not allowed. And yes, you could make the same argument about some of the guys on the list below, but most of today's showboaters are showboating with a purpose rather than showboating for showboating's sake.

Sidenote No. 2: Truly great showboaters have to have a great, Great, GREAT nickname. This is not for debate. So that eliminated T.O. and Ochocinco, too. So it goes.

1. Deion Sanders. He said in his speech he envisioned this persona during his days at FSU, but whether it was by design or accident, there was no bigger show-boater. Dude could seriously back it up, too, but wow did he shine like new money. Favorite Deion athletic story: At FSU, an NCAA track meet was being held while Sanders and the Seminoles baseball team were playing a double-header across campus. Sanders left between games of the twinbill, went over and won a couple of events, including the 100 at the track meet. In baseball pants. Did he have time to change? Probably, but winning the 100 in baseball pants made it "Prime Time."

2. Daryl Dawkins. From the clothes and the half-dozen self-given nicknames, "Chocolate Thunder" loved him some "Chocolate Thunder."

3. Thomas "Hollywood" Henderson. The nickname says all you need to know.

4. Willie Montanez. From the slow home run trots to the repeated tags at first to the quick-wrist flip of the glove to the extended stretch, Montanez had Deion's attitude - just not Deion's talent. His nickname was "Hot Dog." Enough said.

5. Reggie Jackson. Seriously, "Mr. October" was a big-time Big-Timer and ranks as the top showboater who wore glasses - narrowly edging SportTalk's Dr. B (he's a doctor after all).

Here's some honorable mentions:

- ChiChi Rodriguez. If you can hot dog in golf, you're doing some serious hot-dogging.

- Billy "White Shoes" Johnson. This was a tough omission. Johnson launched the end zone celebration craze and was a character. But other than his kicks and his dance moves, Johnson was not that flashy.

- Babe Ruth. If for no other reason than his infamous answer to being asked about making more money than the U.S. President. "I had a better year than he did."

- Muhammad Ali and the rest of the boxing/MMA folks. We left them off because it takes a special amount of internal belief to get in the ring/octagon for a living. If you are not overflowing with self-confidence, then you're going to get killed, so that's not showboating as much as surviving.

- The 5-at-10, if for one brief moment: Quick high school hoops story. We're playing at Douglas County, and we're feeling it. We had 29 points at halftime, and our coach said he was going to let us go for the school record as long as the 5-at-10 didn't embarrass him. First possession of the third quarter, we bury a 3 from the corner, and as soon as we turned it loose we look at their student section and yell, "No one can stop me." Next dead ball, Coach Boyd pulls me and says, "I can stop you. Have a seat. Good game." Finished with 32 points in a blowout win.

From AJ

photo Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer, left, reaches to pull Ocho Cinco off the back of receiver Chad Johnson (85) just prior to kickoff of their NFL football game with the Atlanta Falcons, Sunday, Oct. 29, 2006, in Cincinnati. Johnson had been told he would be fined if he wore the name during the game. (AP Photo/Al Behrman)

Dear Mr. 10,

Chad OchoJohnson says he is planning to stay with a fan for a few weeks at the beginning of the season. Would you let him crash on your couch? Are there any athletes/sports personalities who you would not allow at your house? My Jack Russell mix says to say no to a certain ex-Falcons QB. My insurance agent would say Plaxico is not allowed. My financial adviser says Jim Donnan is not allowed. As for me, I would definitely send Chris Berman "back back back back" home. Most relief pitchers would also get the boot because they are either crazy or would clean out the cupboard (cut to a shot of angry Bob Wickman going "Hey?!?" with a mouth full of tater tots).

Who would you (and/or Mrs. 10) consider a persona non grata among athletes?

AJ,

Yet another great "thinking" question. Our list would include a whole lot of sports personalities - Berman was a great, Great, GREAT call, by the way, and we quickly would add Lenny Dykstra and A-Rod - but the Mrs. 5-at-10's list was more entertaining.

Mrs. 5-at-10's quick hit list and quotes:

- "I would not want Ray Lewis here."

- "Big Ben Roethlisberger is not invited."

- "I'd probably let Peyton [Manning] come for a few days. He seems like a normal guy, and he'd spend most of time watching game videos anyway."

- "I'll tell you who I'm not letting come here - Troy Polamalu. Nobody wants that hair in the drain."

- "I'm pretty sure we don't want Nick Fairley here either. That's a lot of groceries right there."

- "Vince Young and Pacman and the rest of the strip-club mafia is not welcome here either."

And of course, Tiger Woods is not on the guest list of any married folks anywhere. Let's just move along. Speaking of Tiger...

From Weena,

photo Tiger Woods takes a drop on the sixth hole after hitting a ball in the water during the first round of the PGA Championship golf tournament Thursday, Aug. 11, 2011, at the Atlanta Athletic Club in Johns Creek, Ga. (AP Photo/David J. Phillip)

Hey 5-hole,

Tiger's done, right? Dude couldn't play dead in an western and now he's getting punked by a caddie. Danny "Stinkin'" Noonan is talking smack about El Tigre, and how does he respond? That's right he drops a big 77 on everyone.

He's cooked.

Hey, love the show, even though you talk entirely too much and have a huge head.

Weena,

Thanks for the "constructive" criticism.

As for the question, a year ago, we would have turned blue in the face arguing with you. A year ago, we thought Tiger was going to put all the lies and personal destruction behind him and go nuclear on the golf world. Hey, if he could win 14 majors living a life filled with an untold number of lies, how good would he be without carrying all the secrets and baggage and such. At least that's what we thought then.

Now, who knows. He could come back - he is Tiger Woods - or he could never win again and complete the biggest 180 in sports history.

And Weena, you bring up a good point about his 77 on Thursday at the PGA. If this had been three years ago, after all the talk and the caddie-tastrophy, Woods would have been closer to a 57 than a 77 in his first round back on the course after all the drama.

From The Sidewinder

photo Southeastern Conference Commissioner Mike Slive talks with reporters during Southeastern Conference Football Media Days in Birmingham, Ala., on Wednesday. (AP)

Enjoy the 5at10 - it's a great way to start the morning.

But why do you and the paper only write about the SEC? What about the ACC or the Big 12?

Yes, the SEC has won the last five titles, but there's a lot of college football out there that people are interested in.

Thanks, and tell JordanRules to shut up.

S-winder,

Thanks for the kind words and for stopping by. Swing by more often.

The SEC-heavy talk here is dictated by our region and our readers' interest. After asking the Sports Editor of the TFP about it, he said the overwhelming number of complaints about our college football coverage were still SEC-related.

The top complaints come from UT fans, either wanting to know why he hates the Vols or wanting to make sure we know what state Chattanooga is in. (Any time we put a Georgia story or an Alabama story on the front page and no UT story on the front, we are certain to get the call, "Hey, do you know what state you're in, son?")

The next most frequent complaint is "Why do you not do more on Bama?" followed by people asking the Sports Editor why he hates Auburn. Seriously.

So it goes, and any call asking questions means those folks are reading, so we're always glad to answer them.

Except those yahoos who belly-ache about MMA - those people are over-the-top.

Enjoy the weekend, and shut up JordanRules.

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