Mark Wiedmer"Lack of discipline."
"Compounded mistakes."
"A really tough 30 minutes for me I hope I never experience again."
Only one other time in golf history have we possibly experienced a meltdown by a final-nine leader in a major similar to the one Spieth suffered at Augusta National's 12th hole Sunday afternoon.
It's a name to make every golfer who has ever so much as clanged one against the windmill at the local miniature golf course wince: Jean van de Velde. And even van de Velde's collapse on the 18th hole at Carnoustie in the 1999 British Open's final round only delivered a triple bogey that forced him into a playoff he lost to Paul Lawrie.
Spieth tossed a quadruple bogey at the par-3 12th, an implosion so abysmal and astonishing it all but instantly slipped the green jacket on the slender frame of England's Danny Willett, who wouldn't even have been in the Masters if his son - who was expected to be born Sunday - hadn't arrived a couple of weeks early.
Said CBS's Jim Nantz to Willett inside Butler's Cabin afterward: "April 10th was the due date - you just didn't know for what."
As for what to make of Spieth's situation, no one quite knows the appropriate words just yet.
Was it a choke? Was it all the proof needed that he's really good, but he's not exactly Tiger Woods at the same age? Was it the dispiriting moment that ultimately inspires the young Texan to become what all had hoped he could be: Tiger without the tawdry, trashy private life?
Or was it the moment that sadly crushes him, not unlike Arnold Palmer's collapse over the final nine of the 1966 U.S. Open at Olympia? Ahead by seven strokes with nine to play, Palmer somehow wound up in an 18-hole playoff with Billy Casper, which he lost. The most popular golfer ever - who had four green jackets, two British Open wins and a U.S. Open victory - never won another major.
Spieth's but 22. There's no reason he can't rally from this. Even the fact that he somehow gathered himself well enough to make birdies on two of the next three holes following that quadruple strongly hints this will ultimately be little more than a hiccup on his march to turn his two major victories to date (last year's Masters and U.S. Open tournaments) into 10 or more before he's done.
But this is also the kind of collapse that robs one of sleep and confidence, filling the head and heart with nightmares and doubt and uncertainty, which are the last things a golfer wants to have to overcome.
Just as bad, at least for this Masters, it casts an unfortunate fog over the unsung Willett's wonderful win. It wasn't his fault that Spieth splish-splashed twice on No. 12. He was merely the only one able to take advantage of it well enough to become only the second English player ever - Nick Faldo, with three green jackets total, was the first - to win golf's most storied crown.
All Willett did was arrive in Augusta late Monday night, play smart golf for four rounds and seize the opportunity when it was offered. Five down to the defending champ with six holes to play, he birdied three of those final six holes. And his birdie on No. 16, a masterfully crafted tee shot to leave a short, below-the-hole putt to reach his 5-under-par score, was reminiscent of Tiger, Phil or Jack at their loosest and most lethal.
Then, as only the Brits can do with classic understatement, Willett said of his bogey-free final round: "It was just a very surreal day."
Golf has seemed a bit surreal ever since Woods was supposedly chased down his driveway by his angry wife in the early morning hours of Nov. 27, 2009, as he attempted to leave the family's Florida home following a marital spat. Driving his SUV into a fire hydrant, he suffered injuries, eventually took a leave from golf and has never been the same since admitting to numerous marital infidelities, enduring a messy, costly divorce and later suffering golf-related injuries.
Spieth was supposed to be the guy to put the game back on a smoothly spinning axis, and he might yet. Had he held on to his five-stroke lead over Sunday's final nine holes, he would have been the first golfer in history to lead the same major for all four rounds over two straight years.
But he didn't hold up, and his game, to be honest, had wobbled all weekend. After a splendid opening 66, Spieth's final three rounds at Augusta were all over par.
Now the dark side of his early fame will unfold.
Is he overrated? Can he handle success? What's the over/under on when he's dismissed as a flash in the pan?
Cruel? Unfair? Impossible? Absolutely on the first two. But if Spieth hasn't won his third major by the close of the 2019 Masters, listen closely to the critiques. They won't warm your heart.
Yet for everyone who sees this as the tournament Spieth lost, there should be at least that many who prefer to celebrate the tournament Willett won.
"It's been crazy," said the winner.
If Spieth is indeed back among the mortals for a bit, pro golf could be both crazy and surreal for some time to come.
Contact Mark Wiedmer at mwiedmer@timesfreepress.com.