Tennessee athletic director, John Currie, is seen before an NCAA college football game Saturday, Oct. 14, 2017, in Knoxville, Tenn. (AP Photo/Wade Payne)Welcome to the Big Orange Nation held hostage, day 38.
That's the number of days it's been since Georgia routed Tennessee's football team 41-0 inside Neyland Stadium, ending all doubt for most Volniacs regarding Butch Jones' coaching future.
Never mind that some UT fans view that number as at least 14 days too short, since it was two weeks earlier that the Volunteers let one slip away at Florida thanks in part to a number of questionable coaching calls, the last of which was allowing the Gators to throw a 63-yard touchdown pass on the final play of the game, which was exactly the same length and basically the same play that beat Jones' third UT squad in the Swamp two years earlier.
Then again, the less compassionate among the BON's citizenry might place that number at 1,796, which just happens to be the total number of days (according to my feeble math skills) that Jones has been on the job.
But regardless of how many days you've been depressed, angered or made apathetic by the current state of the program, if you subscribe to the overwhelming belief that the fifth-year coach's termination is a matter of when rather than if, the Vols soon will need a replacement.
So as a public service to UT athletic director John Currie - who would seem to need all the help he can get in the first football coach hiring of his career - I'm nominating 15 coaches for the job, their names grouped in three groups of five.
The A List is made up of the most coveted and certain to succeed; the B List for those in the Jones fraternity of coaches who might work but might not, with the C List covering those who could pleasantly surprise but could also bitterly disappoint.
Let's start with A Listers, guys who are almost certain to be an improvement on the current model, though paying them won't be cheap, even though it might become a bargain if you listen to Alabama's economic numbers since $11.1 million-a-year Nick Saban took over.
1. Jon Gruden. Yes, it's a loooooong shot, likely a pipe dream and almost certainly a waste of time. Plus, at least a few fans and UT administrators are probably still a wee bit miffed that he appeared to ditch them at the altar before Jones was hired. Still, if any single name can electrify the fan base, mesmerize recruits the nation over and put together a first-class coaching staff, it's Gruden, who was once a Big Orange grad assistant for Johnny Majors, met his wife at UT, owns property east of Knoxville and reportedly has a child in school there now.
2. Bob Stoops. The retired Oklahoma coach with a national championship ring is another long shot, and he already has denied that he'll ever return to coaching. Still, he's only 57, is a close friend of former UT coach Phillip Fulmer and knows the SEC - even if he doesn't always say nice things about it - from his time as a Florida assistant under Steve Spurrier.
3. Bobby Petrino. The Louisville coach might force even the most amoral of UT fans to head for the showers after every Vols triumph, but no college coach on the planet runs a more exciting and lethal offense. He may never leave coaching for the priesthood, but his sins always have had more to do with the Ten Commandments than the NCAA rule book. Just win, baby, a lot of Volniacs have begun to say, and Petrino always has been a winner on game day.
4. Dan Mullen. Because Florida athletic director Scott Stricklin was at Mississippi State before taking over the Gators, most believe Mullen soon will leave the Bulldogs for the Swamp. But if Stricklin looks elsewhere, Mullen would seem a perfect fit for the Vols.
5. Gary Patterson. A great coach and seemingly good guy, Patterson has worked wonders at TCU, which for years was the Vanderbilt of the old Southwest Conference, having gone 14-82 from 1974 to 1982. It might cost $7 million a year to hire him (he made $5.1 mil after bonuses last season), but as long as he remains with the Horned Frogs he'll always be in the shadow of the NFL's Dallas Cowboys and the University of Texas.
As for the B Listers, let's put Central Florida's Scott Frost at the top, Virginia Tech and former Memphis coach Justin Fuente second, Iowa State's Matt Campbell third, Oregon's Willie Taggart fourth and Purdue's Jeff Brohm fifth.
Though it shouldn't fall to this, you could make a worse C list than Southern Cal assistant and former UT national champion quarterback Tee Martin, Memphis coach Mike Norvell - who would be higher if he could bring senior quarterback and former UT Vol Riley Ferguson and his 27 TD passes and 2,881 passing yards this season along with him, North Carolina State coach Dave Doeren (who's making only $1.8 million a year with the Wolfpack), Detroit Lions assistant and former Vols reserve QB Jim Bob Cooter and Georgia offensive coordinator Jim Chaney, who remains the only undefeated head coach in UT history (1-0).
Finally, because every coaching list needs a wil-card pick, while every member of the BON might love to see Peyton Manning as the next coach, let's throw in former Vols coach Lane Kiffin - who's 6-3 at Florida Atlantic right now - as the most unique option possible.
Regardless, the only thing worse than not hiring one of these 15 (or almost anyone else) is Currie not firing Jones. At that point, the Big Orange Nation might begin to hold its AD hostage until Jones no longer coaches the Vols.
Contact Mark Wiedmer at mwiedmer@timesfreepress.com.