Mind Coffee: Only a birdbrain would take the 'Bird Box Challenge'

January 16, 2019 at 1:00 a.m. | Updated January 15, 2019 at 7:50 p.m.

by Shawn Ryan

This file image released by Netflix shows Sandra Bullock in a scene from the film, "Bird Box." Netflix lifted the usually tightly sealed lid on its viewership numbers in a recent tweet that disclosed 45 million subscriber accounts had watched the thriller, "Bird Box," during its first seven days on the service. That made the film the biggest first-week success of any movie made so far for Netflix's 12-year-old streaming service. (Merrick Morton/Netflix via AP, File)
This file image released by Netflix shows Sandra Bullock in a scene from the film, "Bird Box." Netflix lifted the usually tightly sealed lid on its viewership numbers in a recent tweet that disclosed 45 million subscriber accounts had watched the thriller, "Bird Box," during its first seven days on the service. That made the film the biggest first-week success of any movie made so far for Netflix's 12-year-old streaming service. (Merrick Morton/Netflix via AP, File)

Sometimes you just throw up your hands and say, "We're doomed as a species."

The breathtaking stupidity of people can be absolutely frightening, especially the ability to ignore any sliver of good sense, to not listen to the part of their brain that says, "You're an idiot!"

photo Shawn Ryan

The most recent example of mind-boggling imbecility is the "Bird Box Challenge," which has been picking up steam on social media. This "Hey, watch this!" boneheadedness is based on "Bird Box," the Netflix movie in which the human race must wear blindfolds when they look through windows or go outside because, if they don't, they will go insane and kill themselves.

In one scene, the blindfolded protagonists must get in an SUV and, using only the talking GPS device in the dashboard, make their way through the body- and car-strewn streets to find food.

Seeing this on TV, a 17-year-old girl decided it would be a hoot to see if she could drive a pickup truck in real life with her eyes covered. Breaking news: She couldn't.

While driving about 35 mph, she pulled a beanie hat over her eyes and - surprise! - veered into oncoming traffic, hit another car, a light pole and a concrete barrier. Luckily no one was hurt.

Netflix is understandably appalled people would even try something so stupid and released a statement saying, "Can't believe I have to say this, but: PLEASE DO NOT HURT YOURSELVES WITH THIS BIRD BOX CHALLENGE." (The capitalization is Netflix's.)

Spreading knowledge is one of the good traits of social media; spreading moronic knowledge is not, and a lot of these memes are moronic. For example, the Tide-Pod challenge (eat them for foamy-mouth foolery); ingest bath salts for a freaky high (some call it "death"); eat a spoonful of cinnamon in 60 seconds without drinking anything (because choking and gagging is a good time); put salt on your skin then hold ice to it (frostbite is fun).

Sure, you could take the optimistic view and see this as "thinning the herd," but that's pretty cynical, albeit pretty accurate. But in the longer view, it seems to be an indication that our species is becoming even more susceptible to the idea that looking like a brainless yahoo on YouTube is a stepping stone to international stardom, or at least notoriety which, to some, is the same thing.

There's a poster that says: "Remember, 50 percent of the population has below-average intelligence." We're seeing living proof of that.

Contact Shawn Ryan at mshawnryan@gmail.com.

Upcoming Events