If you go
What: Ultimate Date NightWhen: 7 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 27Where: Chattanooga Convention Center, 1150 Carter St.Tickets: $20-$25For tickets and information: http://firstthings.org/events or 267-5383.Chattanooga, TN
Can a simple date night really make that much difference in a marriage?
You have probably heard about the benefits of eating dinner together as a family and the preventative factors associated with pulling off this feat. Your children are less likely to get involved with drugs and alcohol and more likely to do well in school. Believe it or not, the same thing applies to your marriage.
Connectedness is the reason eating meals together as a family and going on dates with your spouse are so impactful. People who are connected in meaningful relationships such as marriage and family tend to feel more secure, supported, understood and valued. This usually leads to more positive interactions with loved ones.
Some find it hard to believe that simply going on regular date nights can actually enhance your marriage. Yet studies show that couples who engage in novel activities that are fun, active or otherwise arousing - from hiking and dancing to travel and card games - enjoy higher levels of relationship quality and, in turn, counteract the tendency to take each other for granted.
Regular date nights also have the potential to reduce unnecessary conflict in a marriage because couples are actually making time to communicate with each other. This is a big deal because research indicates the average amount of time couples spend talking with each other per week is a whopping 17 minutes.
In addition, date nights have the potential to intensify or rekindle that romantic spark, help sustain the fires of love over the long haul and strengthen a couple's sense of commitment to one another. Partners who put one another first, steer clear of other romantic opportunities and cultivate a strong sense of "we-ness" or togetherness are markedly happier than are less-committed couples.
A National Marriage Project study found that couples who spend time together at least once a week are about three times more likely to report that they are "very happy" in their marriage and highly satisfied with their sexual relationship compared to couples who spend less couple time together.
If you haven't been on a date in a while and are thinking it might be a good idea, you might want to check out Chattanooga's Ultimate Date Night on Oct. 27. At the event, sponsored by First Things First, Michael O'Brien will offer romantic tunes and other songs. Marriage and family expert Mark Gungor will share insights about marriage.
With all of life's commitments, it's easy to put date nights on the back burner. Now is always a good time to invest in your relationship.
Julie Baumgardner is president and CEO of First Things First. Contact her at julieb@firstthings.org.