Guilt. It's something most every parent feels at one time or another.
My daughter, Kacee, experienced it last Monday afternoon when she got a call from my grandson's school asking if she forgot to pick him up at school. William, 5, a kindergartner, had been the last kid standing in the car line, so a teacher took him to the office and called Kacee.
Karen Nazor HillThe good news is that the staff at William's school, Nolan Elementary, knows Kacee and realized that something must have happened. She's been a volunteer in the kids' classrooms at the school since her oldest daughter, Tilleigh, 11, started kindergarten there six years ago. Evie, 8, the middle child, is in the third grade at Nolan. The staff was aware that William hadn't been abandoned, and they reassured the little fellow that someone was on their way to get him.
Turns out, Kacee had forgotten to send a note to William's teacher saying he needed to ride the bus instead of her picking him up that particular day. The reason? Evie was at home with a stomach virus, and Kacee had been up with her most of the night. By morning, with no sleep, Kacee was exhausted. She forgot to write the note.
Meanwhile, that afternoon, I was in my car at the bus stop waiting on William when I got a call from Kacee asking me to instead pick him up at school. I was helping out because she had taken the day off from work to take care of Evie.
When Kacee explained what had happened, I heard the guilt and sorrow in her voice. I instantly shared her guilt as I headed toward the school.
You see, I did something similar many years ago when my youngest son, Kit, was in the seventh grade at Our Lady of Perpetual Help School. I forgot to pick him up after soccer practice one day. I thought my mom was getting him, but she had told me earlier that she wouldn't be able to. I didn't remember until I got home from work that evening and was making dinner. Soccer practice had ended an hour earlier.
When I got to OLPH, I found my son asleep on the bleachers.
Though Kit forgave me, I never forgave myself.
I had the same feeling of guilt as I drove to get William.
When I entered the building, William ran straight to me. His bottom lip quivered when he told me that his mommy forgot to write a note about riding the bus. I explained to him the situation and that we would try our best to make sure it never happened again.
And then I kissed him a million times.
Turns out, we got home at 4:30, just 15 minutes later than when the bus would have arrived.
William was safe with the dedicated staff at Nolan. When something goes wrong, these are the people who make it right, and, to a parent and grandparent, that means everything.
But, still, Kacee and I felt awful. Heck, Kit is 36 years old, a scientist, married and has a child, and I can still see him on the bleachers where he fell asleep waiting for me to pick him up after soccer practice.
Guilt. It's something most every parent feels at one time or another - but you've got to learn to let it go. I'm still trying.
Contact Karen Nazor Hill at khill@timesfreepress.com.