"A Chorus Line" raves about one singular sensation. Sports fans chant, "We're No. 1." And life in general rewards the person who can claim to be numero uno. Yes, if there's one number everybody cheers for, that number would be 1.
But that's about to change, at least for 24 hours. This week, we can all celebrate Two's Day, when Tuesday falls on 2/22/22.
To mark this primary secondary occasion, we've assembled 22 things to think about on Two's Day. You'll learn a little history, find reasons to appreciate things that come in pairs and get ideas for how to spend the day (wear tutus and toupees!). To be sure, there are plenty of options for your 2/22/22 to-do list.
Let's get to it.
1. Write with a No. 2 pencil. Described by mentalfloss.com as "everyone's second-favorite writing implements," No. 2 pencils are considered the Goldilocks of pencil grades. Grades are the numbers U.S. pencil makers use to indicate how hard and dark the lead is. With a No. 2, the lead is not too dark and not too light, and it's not too hard and not too soft. No. 2 is perfection.
2. Do the not-so-simple math. We can all agree that 1+1=2, but the equation doesn't always work in reverse. This puzzler is proof: If someone says, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put in your two cents, where does the other penny go? (Use your No. 2 pencil, and show your work.)
3. Toast George Washington's birthday, also Tuesday, with a Samuel Adams beer. Why? Because Washington's No. 2, Vice President John Adams, who later became the second president, was second cousins with fellow Founding Father Samuel Adams, the namesake of the Boston Beer Co.'s flagship brand.
4. Appreciate your modern pants. Did you know that the reason we sometimes refer to a "pair" of pants, even though it's a single garment, hearkens back to the days when what constituted pants - or pantaloons, as they were then known - consisted of two separate items, one for each leg? According to britannica.com, they were put on one at a time and then secured around the waist. Despite advances, it's still customary to put them on one leg at a time.
5. And also your socks. According to online sources, a type of sock known as "piloi" was first recorded in ancient Greece as early as the 8th century B.C. They were made from leather or matted animal hair. And back then it was perfectly OK to wear socks with sandals.
6. And also your shoes. Did you know that shoes were identical, with no distinction between left and right, until the 19th century? According to lifehack.org, the first pair of right- and left-footed shoes were made in Philadelphia in 1818.
7. Watch a movie with "2" in the title. Start with "Two Weeks Notice" or "Two Mules for Sister Sara."
8. Or a sequel. Maybe "Rocky II" or "2 Fast 2 Furious"? Fun fact: Two Thumbs Up, the phrase that movie critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert popularized, signifying they both liked a movie, is a registered trademark.
9. Listen to songs with "2" in the title. On our playlist: "Two of Us" by The Beatles and "Two Hearts Beat as One" by U2.
10-13. Speak in couplets.
- Start with a couple of couplets from Shel Silverstein: "I cannot go to school today," / Said little Peggy Ann McKay. / "I have the measles and the mumps, / a gash, a rash and purple bumps."
- Don't forget Dr. Seuss: I do not like green eggs and ham. / I do not like them Sam I Am.
- Working up to Shakespeare: For sweetest things turn sourest by their deeds; / lilies that fester smell far worse than weeds. - Sonnet 94
- And ending with a bad greeting card sentiment: I see your face when I am dreaming. / That's why I always wake up screaming.
14. Go on a double date. Days like Two's Day make us miss 2 Squares a Day, the Amnicola Highway restaurant that closed during the early days of the pandemic. But at least three other places fit the theme: DosBros and (think about it) Cici's Pizza and Mimi's Deli. Or there's always tea for two at Polly Claire's (named for two sisters). Extra credit if you get your food to go.
15. Go dancing. Surely, two left feet could be overlooked on Two's Day. The Texas two-step is a given, and you know how many it takes to tango.
16. Re-read the story of Noah and the ark in the Bible. Despite the common shorthand version of events, Genesis 7:2-3 indicates that not all of the animals came in twos. Only the "unclean" ones came in single pairs, male and female. The "clean" animals and birds came in seven pairs, male and female. Some Bible historians say the extras were for sacrifices and for eating.
17-19. Celebrate other observances that coincide with Two's Day.
- Like Supermarket Employee Day. It's the second annual observance of this day honoring front-line grocery workers.
- Or Cook a Sweet Potato Day. Top your tuber with two pats of butter.
- Or National Margarita Day. Find a bar that offers two-for-one drinks during happy hour.
20. Say hello to twins you know. There are more of them than there used to be. According to statista.com, the U.S. birth rate for twins has risen significantly since 1980, when the rate was 18.9 twins per 1,000 live births. By 2019, the rate was 32.1. The rise is attributed to the increased use of in vitro fertilization and other assisted reproductive technologies.
21. Snack on the (un)official foods of Two's Day. We've covered tea and Taco Tuesday, but don't forget Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls, Twinkies, Tootsie Rolls, Twix candy bars, double-stick Popsicles, Dubble Bubble gum and Double Mint gum. Oh, and pears.
22. Go No. 2. Speaking of food, umass.edu reports that the normal range for emptying your bowels is from three times a day to once every three days, which means the average person goes about once a day. And Two's Day would be a good day for a No. 2 day. Wait, you think bathroom references are a waste of good newspaper space? Touché.
Contact Lisa Denton at ldenton@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6281.