If all our days are numbered, what happens when the numbers get out of sync? Or days on the calendar just - poof! - disappear?
Is that even possible? Apparently it is.
In what may be yet another lingering effect of the Dumpster fire that was 2020, two key dates are missing in the Tennessee Valley Authority's 2021 calendars that were distributed in early December to addresses within 10 miles of the Sequoyah Nuclear Plant in Soddy-Daisy. Yes, sadly, keepers of these calendars will be unable to mark any significant events on Jan. 29 and May 29.
Because those days are gone.
In January and May, the 29th is AWOL.
It tried to cover its tracks. In January, the 28th stands in twice - on Thursday, which is correct, and on Friday, which is overdoing it. In May, the 30th does double duty - making a too-early appearance on Saturday and then in its correct place on Sunday.
Like we wouldn't notice. But there are real-life implications when time slips away.
"I noticed May as I was marking birthdays and anniversaries of my children on the calendar," said Helen Karl in a Nextdoor post.
On Facebook, David Champion said a friend "immediately noticed he doesn't have a birthday" on Jan. 29, 2021 - at least not on the Sequoyah calendar.
TVA spokeswoman Malinda Hunter said it's unclear how the two days went off the grid, but she believes they escaped during the production process at the printer.
"I don't know how it would happen, and obviously they didn't either," she said of the printer.
There is a fix on the way, though.
"The company we used to do it has agreed to send out stickers at no cost, so everybody will receive two stickers for the 29th to place on those two months," Hunter said. "We're paying for the stickers, and they're paying for the shipping."
Hunter said the misprint is unfortunate, but the calendars' main purpose is the emergency preparedness information on the first 11 pages. Those pages, which were double- and triple-checked for accuracy, provide information on such things as siren tests, which are normal, and evacuation orders, which are not, which is why you'd want to have the calendar handy in the unlikely event of an emergency.
Just don't consult it for the correct days of the week in January and May - until you get your stickers in the mail.
Email Lisa Denton at ldenton@timesfreepress.com.