I am hesitant to do this, but why not? It's a Monday.
In fact, it's a crazy Monday that had a "Saturday Night Live" sketch making fun of Democrats, a big-time entertainment award show with a pro-Trump celebrity wearing a "Pro Wall" dress down to the barb-wire shoulders and the "MAGA" hand bag, and some football acronym known as the AAF as one of the highest-rated sports event of the weekend.
Who saw that coming?
Well, in honor of up being down and cats and dogs living together in relative bliss, I offer this:
Democrats, you are headed for 2020 destruction. It's a simple matter of math, despite facing one of the most polarizing presidents in our history.
While the cliche about strength and numbers is true in most fights, this political scrum screams the more the scarier.
The avalanche of blah-tastic possibilities started earlier this month when Hillary Clinton did not rule out what would be something close to a 19th White House attempt. (Yes, upon hearing that news, I said PopTarts, the frosted breakfast treat, had a better chance than ol' Hollar-y. Some of you did not like that. That's OK. But an important distinction must be made: Frosted PopTarts would beat Hilary; unfrosted PopTarts are as popular as tax increases and IRS audits.)
Two more women dove into the candidate pool over the weekend.
The addition of U.S. Sen. Amy Klobuchar, D-Minnesota, and ol' Chief Wahoo herself Sen. Elizabeth Warren, D-Massachusetts, brings the Democrat candidate field to eight — or roughly the number of Democrats at an eight-member PETA meeting or seven more than Ray Stevens' entire body of the Grand Mystic Royal Order of the Nobles of the Ali Baba Temple of the Shrine.
The rest of this left field, as we know it this minute (and this minute is 4 p.m. Monday; there may be three more Clintons, two Kennedys and a special exception for one of the Obama girls) includes: self-help expert Marianne Williamson, U.S. Sen. Kamala Harris of California, U.S. Sen. Kirsten Gilibrand of New York, and U.S. Rep. Tulsi Gabbard of Hawaii, as well a couple of dudes — U.S. Sen. Cory Booker of New Jersey and former Housing Secretary Julian Castro.
This is a mathematical equation for a negative result. Period.
That's eight candidates with a possibility that number reaches double digits sooner rather than later, and the total could hit 20 before all is said and done.
Forget the surge of the president's polished State of the Union — for Peter Jennings' sake, a CNN poll (yes that CNN) had Trump's speech getting a 76 percent approval rating — or the Democrat demolition from the Virginia knuckleheads. We'll see several surges and countless controversies between now and the real presidential pursuit later this year.
With so many candidates jockeying for position, money and party support, whoever emerges from the primary process to challenge Trump better be better heeled than the field at the Kentucky Derby and better funded than a Third World nation.
The Democrats' desperation to topple Trump appears to have blinded them to a stark truth: Their primary will be exhausting to the voters and monstrously expensive. Worse, it will be devastatingly divisive. And that, my friends, likely will lead to their defeat. Again.
Contact Jay Greeson at firstname.lastname@example.org and 423-757-6343.