Happy Independence Day! You definitely deserve a holiday, people. It's tough trying to keep up on current events when you want to block out four-fifths of what's going on.
But hey, nobody said being a well-informed voter was easy. Let's see what you remember:
1. Having been called "Sleepy Joe" by Donald Trump for months, Joe Biden began trying to dub Trump with the nickname ...
A. Tweety. B. Sylvester. C. Ramp Man.
2. After he lost the primary in New Hampshire, Biden told his supporters ...
A. "Iowa and Nevada have spoken." B. "They don't call it the Granite State for nothing." C. "You know, I like that place better when the leaves are turning."
3. Recalling his now-famous walk down a ramp at West Point, Trump said that while he needed some help getting down the "slippery" part at the top, by the last 10 feet he was running and ...
A. "Way faster than Barack Obama." B. "Looked very handsome." C. "Had no idea how I was going to stop."
4. When Trump wanted to demonstrate that he was being serious about combating the coronavirus, he introduced business leaders he claimed would be heading the fight. The one who got his particularly effusive welcome was ...
A. The head of MyPillow. B. That woman who used to be his assistant on "The Celebrity Apprentice." C. Ivanka.
5. At a meeting with farmers, Trump warned his audience that without the Second Amendment ...
A. "We'd have nothing to talk about at all those rallies." B. "We'd have to find out what the Third Amendment is." C. "You'll have nobody guarding your potatoes."
6. Eric Trump gave a controversial interview in which he appeared to be arguing that Democrats ...
A. Created the coronavirus to hurt the Trump campaign. B. Tempted Eve to eat an apple in the Garden of Eden. C. Were all members of a secret society dedicated to stamping out professional sports.
7. Donald Jr. created a stir when he sent out an Instagram post calling Joe Biden a ...
A. Pedophile. B. Bibliophile. C. Nail file.
8. Donald Jr. has a rifle decorated with ...
A. Endangered species he has killed. B. A picture of Hillary Clinton behind bars. C. A fantasy drawing of the dog his father never let him have.
9. Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis said he included professional wrestling as an "essential" business that was allowed to operate during the pandemic because Floridians were ...
A. "Starved for content." B. "Really missing Hulk Hogan." C. "Yearning to be known as the SmackDown State."
10. The Obamas reportedly got about $60 million as an advance for their memoirs. Michelle's is an international best seller, but Barack's has yet to hit the stores. Our former president explained that's because ...
A. "Girls just write better." B. "You know some days I wake up, look out at the world and just go back to bed with my head under a pillow." C. "She had a ghostwriter."
11. During the Senate impeachment trial, Republican Sen. Susan Collins said she was voting to acquit the president because she believed he ...
A. Had learned his lesson. B. Needed a friend. C. Was going to invite her whole family out to breakfast, very soon.
12. When he managed to quash any new impeachment witnesses in the Senate, Majority Leader Mitch McConnell made a speech ...
A. Explaining that the agenda for the rest of the year would be "shut up and wait for the election." B. Bragging that he was making Democratic judges "rarer than the Sumatran rhinoceros." C. Denouncing partisanship.
ANSWERS: 1-A; 2-A; 3-B; 4-A; 5-C; 6-A; 7-A; 8-B; 9-A; 10-C; 11-A; 12-C