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Photo by Rajesh Kumar Singh of The Associated Press / White House Senior Adviser Jared Kushner and his wife Ivanka Trump visit the Taj Mahal Agra, India, on Feb. 24, 2020.

Hey, what do you think the Trump kids are up to? Been a long time since we checked.

Not that they're keeping low profiles. Eric, for instance, made news recently when he claimed Democrats created the coronavirus to hobble Trump's campaign.

"They think they're taking away Donald Trump's greatest tool, which is being able to go into an arena and fill it with 50,000 people every single time," he said on Fox News. "You watch. They'll milk it every single day between now and Nov. 3, and guess what — after Nov. 3 coronavirus will magically all of a sudden go away and disappear."

Eric's defenders said he was simply claiming Democrats were using a national health crisis for political reasons. But the Second Son seemed to be talking about something more dire and well organized.

"Make no mistake ... This is a very cognizant strategy that they're trying to employ," he told interviewer Jeanine Pirro. In fact, he said "cognizant strategy" twice.

Maybe that could become a campaign slogan: "Make America Cognizant Again." About time.

At the same time, Donald Jr. was calling Joe Biden a child molester. Ivanka was helping head up a food program, and that would certainly be no cause for complaint if her husband hadn't been busy casting doubt on whether there'd be a presidential election this fall.

The president and his three oldest kids shared some quality time in the headlines this week when a fraud suit against the four of them moved ahead one step in the courts. Aggrieved investors claim they were lured into what turned out to be a pyramid scheme that did little but pile up cash and pay Donald $450,000 in speaking fees.

Last weekend Donald Jr. got a lot of attention when he suggested Biden molested children. All in fun, of course. That was on his Instagram account (2.8 million followers). "See you later, alligator," said the post next to Biden's picture. "In a while, pedophile," returned an alligator in an adjoining picture.

Junior simultaneously declared himself shocked that people couldn't take a joke.

A few years ago I read a book by Junior's mother, Ivana, who became headline fodder when Trump was having an affair with another woman and wanted the entire city of New York to know it. Donald Jr. was around 12 at the time. Before that, he had broken his leg due to a babysitter's inattention. And Ivana reported that once, when she was out of town, he and Eric called hysterically to report they'd found their nanny dying in the basement.

After I read the book I swore I would never write anything bad about the guy again. But Junior's pedophile post wiped out any guilt I had about a man whose only claim to fame is being the son of one of the most awful people in American history.

Trump has five children, and we are all in agreement that Barron, 14, is to be left alone. Tiffany, 26, is the love child whose birth — accompanied by her father's wild penchant for publicizing his affair — broke up Trump's marriage with Ivana.

What about Ivanka? She's been the administration's cheerleader for social distancing, then took off with her family on a drive to Dad's golf course in New Jersey. But her unforgivable sin was bringing in Jared Kushner as a top Trump adviser. Jared is now floundering around as a coordinator of the White House coronavirus response. His most memorable moment recently came when Time asked him if America could be confident the election would still take place in November.

"I'm not sure I can commit one way or the other, but right now that's the plan," he responded.

Remember, if the president gets reelected they'll all be back for four more years.

The New York Times

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