Wiedmer: Vols QB Brian Maurer is beacon of hope in troubled times

Staff photo by C.B. Schmelter / Tennessee freshman quarterback Brian Maurer pitches the ball under pressure from a Georgia defender last Oct. 5 at Neyland Stadium.
Staff photo by C.B. Schmelter / Tennessee freshman quarterback Brian Maurer pitches the ball under pressure from a Georgia defender last Oct. 5 at Neyland Stadium.

Some of us refer to them as "God moments," those surreal events that often have no plausible explanation other than the notion that a higher power had a hand in them.

One could argue that University of Tennessee rising sophomore quarterback Brian Maurer experienced just such a moment on Jan. 22, just as he was planning to take his own life.

Here's part of what the Ocala, Florida, native posted Friday on Instagram, the first day of May, which also happens to be Mental Health Awareness Month: "I thought I had lost my battle with depression and that my pain had come to an end. As I was going to do it, I looked up and said 'God, if this isn't your plan for me, please send me a sign.' Two minutes later, my mom called me with my baby nephew, Jeremiah, and she said she was just calling to say she loved me. I then knew that by ending my pain, I would be causing so much more to the people who loved me."

No one could ever say Maurer's message wasn't unsettling. Especially for every parent who's even slightly worried about the mental health of their children in the increasingly cruel world of social media and the ageless world of peer pressure.

But it was also uplifting and inspiring at a time when we could all use being lifted up and inspired. These are deeply troubling times, filled with understandable fear, anxiety, anger and, yes, depression. The longer it lasts, the wider it spreads, COVID-19 threatens to make basket cases of us all.

And the fact that Maurer posted it on the first day of Mental Health Awareness Month was as serendipitous for the rest of us as his mom calling him on that fateful January day was for him. It's hard to imagine a more perfect positive story to get the attention of young and old alike.

"My thinking," the 19-year-old Maurer later told ESPN, "was that if a college athlete can come out and speak about how seeking help is the most important thing you can do, then maybe all those people out there struggling will reach out to somebody and know that there is always hope."

Hope. To read deeply into Maurer's Instagram post was to understand how he could have easily lost all hope prior to Jan. 22. His biological father began serving a 25-year prison term when he was in the seventh grade, which was also when his mother and stepfather separated.

Before he was out of high school, his best friend committed suicide and two more close friends lost their lives to gun violence.

Then there's the natural pressure we heap on so many gifted young athletes, especially a star quarterback, to be the rock of stability and strength for less gifted and focused teammates, and in Maurer's case, his own struggling family.

"I always thought that, as a guy, I had to have tough skin and not to let anything bother me," Maurer wrote. "I thought I needed to stay strong for my family and that they couldn't see me down and that I was their shoulder to cry on."

Nor did arriving at Tennessee necessarily soothe his pain, despite starting four games, rushing for a touchdown against Alabama and tossing a beautiful 73-yard scoring pass to Marquez Callaway against Georgia last year.

Often injured, including two concussions, Maurer told ESPN, "Even when I was hurt, I was trying to put a happy face on everything, stay up and not bring any negative energy to the team."

photo AP photo by Vasha Hunt / Tennessee wide receiver Marquez Callaway (1) checks on quarterback Brian Maurer after the freshman was injured during the first half of the Vols' 2019 game at Alabama.

We are all beginning to experience more negative energy than perhaps at any time in this nation's history since the Great Depression. With our economy plunging toward life support, if not already there, it is folly to believe that so many Americans - especially those north of 55, who have worked so hard to position themselves for a comfortable retirement - won't unravel emotionally if this invisible monster known as COVID-19 eventually strips them of their homes, savings, and, far worse, the lives of so many they love.

As after the stock market crash of 1929, we could again be on the edge of extreme feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.

Again, Maurer: "My goal was not to bring attention to myself, but to bring attention to mental health. It's something a lot of people struggle with. And not only younger people, but all people. They battle it every day and keep it a secret."

Maurer's struggles are no longer a secret. But there are assuredly hundreds of thousands of Brian Maurers still out there, darkly contemplating the same tragic, senseless ending he almost embraced.

Given that a general sense of peace and prosperity for the majority of our citizens has never been enjoyed over a longer stretch of time - nearly 50 years and counting - should it not scare the daylights out of our government leaders just exactly what could transpire if/when our longheld sense of security and safety begins to crumble?

Will we become enough of a caring, sharing nation to make the least prosperous and powerful among us our No. 1 priority rather than propping up the most powerful? Are there enough help lines, counselors, doctors and ministers to pull us through? To that end, just in case you're struggling in a manner similar to Maurer, the phone number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 800-273-8255.

Said Maurer on Friday: "I still have some rocky days, but I know I'm going to get the help I need and hope others will join me."

We may not know the identity of UT's starting quarterback until the first week of the season, assuming the coronavirus pandemic abates enough to have a college football season

But we already know the Volunteers' most courageous quarterback. It's not even close. It's Maurer.

photo Mark Wiedmer

Contact Mark Wiedmer at mwiedmer@timesfreepress.com.

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