Late-Night Laughs: Super Bowl LIII
› Last night was Super Bowl LIII, and 53 is also how many people stayed awake for the whole thing. — Jimmy Fallon› While you guys were clapping, the Rams punted six more times. — Jimmy Fallon› Rams quarterback Jared Goff just couldn’t score. Americans said if we wanted to see a football player who can’t score, we’d watch Colton from “The Bachelor.” — Jimmy Fallon› The Rams only scored three points, and they were totally shut out in the second half. They said it was a little hard to concentrate after seeing Adam Levine’s nipples. — Jimmy Fallon› It was the lowest-scoring Super Bowl in history and the lowest-rated in 10 years. It was less of a Super Bowl and more of a Just OK Bowl. — James Corden› I don’t want to hear one more word from Americans about how soccer is dull and no one ever scores for the rest of my life. — James Corden› That was hard to watch, and I’m a Patriots fan. — Conan O’Brien› I found that to be — what is the opposite of a nail-biter? It was a nail-grower. — Conan O’Brien› There was a wardrobe malfunction at the halftime show. The malfunction was someone in the wardrobe department let Adam Levine go on stage dressed like this. — Jimmy Kimmel› What can I say about the Super Bowl that hasn’t already been written on Adam Levine’s torso? — Seth Meyers› The stage was designed to look like the letter M. The M stood for “Maybe we should have tried to get Beyonce.” — Conan O’Brien› Yeah, [Big Boi’s fur coat] was from an animal that took its own life during Maroon 5.” — Conan O’BrienSource: toofab.com
Redneck rules for life
There’s nothing wrong with being a redneck, but there are a few guidelines worth remembering when you’re interacting in polite society.
In general:
» Never take a beer to a job interview.