In the past few weeks, it seems there has been an increase in the amount of accidental deaths in our area. These instances were happening so quickly, I was almost afraid to walk out of the house for fear that something might happen to me or somebody else.
Any death is difficult, but accidental deaths can be the hardest because they are unforgiving. We live our lives with accidents all around us; a waiter at a restaurant drops a whole plate of food; we miss a step and fall down the stairs; we drop our phone and it shatters. We are used to accidents as part of everyday life, but we have made peace with them because they have solutions. We can always buy a new phone, mend a broken bone or apologize if our accident affects someone else.
Death is final. There is no way to go back and correct what happened, which is why those of us who have lost a loved one through an accident struggle with the events that came before the tragedy. In our minds, we replay over and over what we could have done differently, and we obsess over how things would be different if only the timing could have changed by an hour, by a second, by a day.
I go through life never really thinking about time. Yes, I keep up with dates and appointments, and I set an alarm every morning, but the clock, the hours, days, months, years are so stable they lend themselves to a feeling of consistency and trust that I never really question. When something tragic happens, it brings time into perspective.
We have all heard the expression “I was just at the right place at the right time.” Timing dictates our life, and I have to remind myself that it is not always negative. We all exist because of timing. Our parents met through timing and circumstance, which ultimately determined our existence. Before they even met there were circumstances that occurred leading to their eventual meeting.