Dear Abby: Vigilant moms can’t shy away from asking about gun safety

Jeanne Phillips

DEAR ABBY: I am a Yale-trained pediatric nurse with a post-master’s as a psychiatric nurse practitioner. I ask that you retract your answer to “First-Time Mom” (June 21). I’m concerned your response will encourage other mothers to buy into the incorrect assumption that it’s “impolite” to ask questions that ensure their child’s safety. You should encourage “First-Time Mom” to ask about the presence of weapons in other parents’ homes and how they are stored. If she has every playdate at her house and refuses to go to another home because she’s afraid to ask about gun safety, other mothers will see she doesn’t trust their child-rearing capabilities, but won’t know why. It will prevent honest friendships from developing, which will socially isolate her. How will she ever ensure a break for herself by encouraging her child to socialize at another mother’s home she knows to be safe? – COLLEEN M. SULLIVAN, RN, MSN, CPNP

DEAR COLLEEN: I apologize. I should have said: “You are responsible for your child’s welfare. Assuring her safety involves asking whether weapons are on the premises and, if so, what safety precautions have been taken. (The same is true for prescription drugs, swimming pools, caustic chemicals and foods to which your child is allergic.) You should also ask if the children will be under parental supervision at all times. If anyone feels concern for your child’s safety is presumptuous, do not allow your child to play there. Suggest instead that the children play at your house.”

Read on for more perspectives:

DEAR ABBY: I am a pediatrician and a mother. Your advice to “First-Time Mom” about gun safety runs counter to the recommendation of the American Academy of Pediatrics as well as numerous gun violence protection groups.

Research shows that guns are present in one in three homes, and that one in three of those guns is kept loaded and unlocked, posing a risk to children. This is why I routinely recommend that parents inquire about the presence of guns and storage methods at the homes their children visit. I also urge them to discuss with their CHILD the importance of never touching a gun and immediately notifying an adult if they come across a gun or are shown one by another child. – JESSICA MOWRY, M.D.