If Dr. Rozario Slack and his wife, Angela, listed all of ways they are not alike, some counselors would advise them to divorce because of irreconcilable differences, he said.
“If I had mirrored the individualistic culture that I had started being a part of, I would have said forget this. But I learned that, because of the difference she brings, I’m much more balanced,” he said.
This weekend Dr. Slack, pastor of Temple of Faith Deliverance Church of God in Christ, and his wife, a local pediatrician, are hosting a seminar — 10 Great Dates to Energize Your Marriage — to help married couples learn the skills needed to reconcile differences, improve communication and stay together. The seminar continues today from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m.
The seminar is the first of many events Dr. Slack said he plans to host through his Legacy Campaign, which is designed to help black families stay together.
The number of black children living with two married parents dropped from 75 percent to 33 percent between 1960 and 1995, according to the National Center on African American Marriages and Parenting. Now, 69 percent of black births nationally are to single mothers, compared with 33 percent of all births.
But Dr. Slack said he didn’t need to see statistics to know black families need help staying together. He talks daily with people in the families, he said.
“I see the broken lives,” he said. “The children growing up without fathers. I see the marriages that didn’t last.”
This weekend’s seminar is based on a book with the same title. Written by Claudia and David Arp of Virginia, “10 Great Dates to Energize Your Marriage” is intended to help couples communicate better, balance busy lifestyles, increase intimacy, process anger and resolve conflict, Mrs. Arp said.
“People can expect to have a lot of fun,” she said. “It’s very male friendly. The spouses don’t have to talk about their marriage in front of anybody else.”
IF YOU GOWhat: 10 Great Dates to Energize Your MarriageWhen: 10 a.m.-1 p.m. today (continental breakfast will be provided)Where: The Mill, 1601 Gulf St.Admission: $50 per coupleInformation: Call 355-0099 or go to www.thelegacycampaign.com
Dr. Slack said he and his wife followed the Arps’ book themselves and saw benefits from it.
“I see Angie using some of this stuff on me,” he said. “I’m impressed that she returns to it and that she is concerned about our relationship enough to try to find the skills to make it better. And I’m attracted to that.”
He said he can’t walk anywhere without someone stopping him to tell him of “relationship drama.”
“Everybody is looking for a way to make it work,” he said.
Chattanooga resident Jeff Seay said he plans to attend the seminar with his wife, Effie. His goal is to learn how to keep excitement in his marriage so, when tough times come, he can reflect on the positive experiences that they have had, he said.
“I think at the core people have the same desires,” he said. “The key is learning how to arrive at that.”