DEAR ABBY: My husband is desperate for women’s attention, and I’m sure he’d cheat on me the instant he had the chance. We have been together for 12 years. I realize now that while I have had four long-term relationships and a fair share of sexual partners, my husband has had little sexual experience outside of our relationship.
Any time he’s around women, whether I am there or not, he makes it a point to strike up a conversation or gain their attention.
He swears he has never cheated, and I have never found any solid proof other than pornography. I just can’t shake this feeling that he needs or wants to experience other women, and I don’t know what to do. Please help. — MORE EXPERIENCED IN SOUTH DAKOTA
DEAR MORE EXPERIENCED: If you haven’t talked with your husband about this, do it now. Your husband may not be a wannabe philanderer as much as a plain old-fashioned flirt. People of both sexes need validation, particularly if their self-esteem isn’t the highest. You won’t know what’s really driving him unless you can discuss it. If necessary, a marriage and family therapist may be able to help the two of you communicate on a non-threatening level.
DEAR ABBY: When I met my boyfriend, it felt perfect. I thought I had found my soul mate. When I met his family, we got along well and spent more and more time together. I was 28; he was 31. We lived an hour away from his parents, and even though we were there every weekend and sometimes twice a week, his mom began complaining that she didn’t get to see him enough.