It is hard to believe it has just been a year since my last New Year’s resolution, and my ensuing failure to become a better person in 2024, as I promised.
To those I offended in 2024, let me say: Work on yourself, so it will not be so easy for me to do it in 2025.
› The 2024 election mercifully ended. Politicians no longer have to go talk in Midwest farm states. Thus, Iowa farmers will have to go back to fertilizing crops themselves.
› The NFL continued to have issues with concussion protocols to mitigate CTE (Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy). It was made worse by the trainers not being able to use the standard question after a hit, “Who is the president of the United States who is running our country?” When players said, “I do not know,” it was considered correct, and the player was allowed to continue play.
› After not being able to present reasonable policies to beat Trump, Dems went to their go-to snipe, “Trump is Hitler.” Now, with Elon Musk bringing transparency to their beloved government morass, leftists are calling Musk “Hitler.” To be fair, Musk was raised in another country (not Austria), oversaw rocket programs, has zealous followers and created a new type of car for the masses (not Volkswagen). So, they are getting warmer.
› DEI destroyed many institutions and businesses. News, TV and film lost 15,000 jobs in 2024 pushing their woke agenda. Double check the census numbers, but according to what I see on my TV, the USA is 92% LGBTQ, Black or mixed-race couples. Movies aren’t realistic. In the last James Bond movie, the villain was the guy still using plastic straws.
› Joe Biden ends his presidency with his lowest favorability rating since taking office. I’m glad Jimmy Carter could live to see this. After saying he wouldn’t, Joe Biden pardoned his son Hunter for 10 years of transgressions. This emboldened Hunter so much that he went back to the White House Secret Service folks and demanded his cocaine back.
› Biden was backstabbed by his party, then was stroked by Dems who said he should be on Mount Rushmore. Netflix will buy his movie rights, but the “Old Yeller” plot has been done.
› NIL (Name, Image and Likeness) money reshaped college sports. We spent more time discussing the vagaries of who should be in the College Football Playoffs than whether we should be starting World War III. Sexy LSU gymnast Olivia Dunne racked up the most money in the NIL era, $9.5 mil. She is rich and good looking; it was all Trump could do not to appoint her to a Cabinet post.
› Alabama Crimson Tide players claimed their spots in the controversial College Football Playoffs: on their couches in front of their TVs. I decided in my will I want University of Tennessee pallbearers, so they can let me down one last time.
› With wage inflation, self-checkout at stores grew. Security cameras have been added. Most of us don’t like it. Hollywood Gen-Z and millennials do like it, and will drive an hour to a Walmart. They can’t get enough self-checkout. In San Francisco, everything thieves can steal under $900 is free, and over $900 is also free, if you can run fast enough.
› In hopes of becoming the first Kennedy to die of natural causes, RFK Jr.’s MAHA (Make America Healthy Again) initiative will take root. We all eat and drink too much. I wish just once I could spiral into control. Admittedly, I drink too much bourbon. My plan for the new year is to drink a glass of water after every other bourbon, just to surprise my liver.
› Trump’s Cabinet confirmation hearings will be good theater in 2025. Dems have “cried wolf” too much and may be out of deceits. And Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s accuser, Christine Blasey Ford, just remembered that Kash Patel and Pam Bondi were at that high school party, too.
Happy holidays! I’m heading to New York City for a week. Anyone got a fire extinguisher I can borrow?
Contact Ron Hart, a syndicated op-ed satirist, author and radio/TV commentator, at Ron@RonaldHart.com or @RonaldHart on X.