It has been just over a year since I have corralled all of the mental squirrels and done an installment of Random Access Musings. With that long lapse, the squirrels have made it all the way to the attic, proliferated, and must now be dispensed before they chew through any of the wiring. So here goes:
› A few weeks ago, I wrote about the pastor who called for violence against Elon Musk et al. He was not alone; many other voices joined that corrupt cacophony. In short order, Tesla vehicles were being burned, keyed and otherwise vandalized, along with Tesla dealerships. In Arizona, a 61-year-old lady driving a Tesla on Route 66 had a man block her in traffic, walk back to her vehicle and repeatedly punch her in the face. As it turns out, that old kiddie statement “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is just as wrong and just as dumb as people who say things that incite others to violence.
› A moderately popular account on X recently tweeted, “Jesus didn’t die for everyone.” The Bible clearly says the exact opposite, directly declaring that “he died for all” (2 Corinthians 5:14-15) and that it was for the sins of the whole world (1 John 2:2). So how does one end up believing and promoting such blatant falsehood? It’s pretty simple, really; all you need to do is learn how to explain that the Bible does not actually mean what it says.
› If Georgia is not the pollen capital of the entire universe, I don’t know what is.
› I saw a recent online debate in which the free will of man (or the lack thereof) was the subject. I could not help but notice the irony of the “man has no free will” proponent furiously trying to convince the guy who believed in the free will of man to believe that man has no free will; if he has no free will, why would you waste your time trying to convince him of something that he does not have the free will to believe since he can only believe what God has preordained for him to believe? On the other hand, maybe God has not given the no-free-will guy the free will to not argue about free will with the guy he is trying to convince that there is no free will and is sitting back watching the entire meaningless show with glee (he wrote with sarcasm born of his logic and free will).
› If you are ever kidnapped by a bunch of Baptists, just get them talking about church music; while they are screaming and arguing and insulting each other, you can hitch a ride home, and they will never even notice that you are gone.
› My mother skydives. My wife joined her a few years ago. As of last Saturday, my youngest daughter has also joined in the “falling from high places fun.” Three generations of my family women are jumping out of planes, and I, the manly man, am not; the pressure on me is mounting.
› Chicken keepers (who really should be called “chicken tenders”) seem to be almost a cult unto themselves. My wife and I plan on joining them this year, so wish us luck, or redemption, or something.
› I used to think the “we’d like to talk to you about your car’s extended warranty” people were obnoxious until I made it onto the list of the “do you want to sell your home or property” people. I’m pretty sure that after the thousandth different call or so, even Jesus would have hung up on them.
› I would have loved to have seen the horrified look on Joshua’s face when the Children of Israel in Joshua 1:17 said, “According as we hearkened unto Moses in all things, so will we hearken unto thee.” I bet someone had to do the Heimlich maneuver on him.
› Good preaching is not saying everything you could say; it is saying everything you should say. Put another way, a lot of very good 30-minute sermons go on to become really bad by the 55-minute mark.
› Antisemitism and Christianity are utterly incompatible. I mean, do you really think it is OK to say, “Dear Jesus, I love you and hate the people you came from and the people who wrote the Bible that told me about you”?
› The only way a solid majority of Americans will ever agree on a fifth face on Mount Rushmore is if it is the face of the Buc-ees Beaver.
› I block some people online because they spread heresy in a polished, polite, alluring manner. I block others because they tell the truth in a belligerent, crude, profane manner.
› The easiest way to win the lottery, or any other form of gambling, is to invest that money in debt reduction or a good mutual fund instead.
› My son (who apparently inherited my sarcastic streak) sat in a meeting where a proud-of-his-piety preacher said, “Don’t ever tell a preacher that his message helped you; it never helps you until you go home and apply it!” On the way out, my son shook his hand and said, “That message didn’t help me a bit.”
Gotta admit, I was pretty proud of him for that one.
Bo Wagner is pastor of Cornerstone Baptist Church of Mooresboro, North Carolina, a widely traveled evangelist and the author of several books available on Amazon and at wordofhismouth.com. Email him at 2knowhim@cbc-web.org.