DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my amazing husband for two years. He has worked his butt off to put me through school, and I am appreciative and thankful.
He has recently been offered a promotion, which means we will have to move from the South to the Midwest. Though I’m not a fan of the idea, I agreed it would be best for us. I grew up in the North, and took the chance to move down south at 18 because I was miserable there. I hate the possibility that I’ll be miserable again, and I’m afraid I may end up resenting my husband.
If he passes up this opportunity, he may not get another. How can I curb my resentment for having to move to another state I’m pretty sure I won’t be happy in? – FLORIDA GIRL, FOR NOW
DEAR FLORIDA GIRL: One way would be to recognize that you are no longer the miserable 18-year-old girl you were when you moved down south. You have matured, you have a successful marriage and you won’t be moving alone. Once you relocate, involve yourself in the community so you can make new friends. And last (but not least), because people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be, decide to make the best of this opportunity and ALLOW yourself to be happy.
DEAR ABBY: I lost my best friend to AIDS in ’95, my father to cancer in ’06 and my husband/lifetime partner to a heart attack in ’07. My greatest support, John, moved away the following year. A father, friend and partner – too many losses. John filled the holes in my heart, but he’s also gone now, from leukemia.