Punchlines

Late Night Laughs

Keeping up with the candidates› Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders earlier tonight faced off in a debate on PBS, or as PBS calls it, “Antiques Roadshow.” — Seth Meyers› At the debate, Hillary Clinton addressed the controversy of her personal email server and said she has “no concerns about it whatsoever.” Democrats were like, “Yeah, that’s what concerns us.”— Jimmy Fallon› A tattoo shop in Vermont is currently offering a free tattoo of the outline of Bernie Sanders’ head. Or, as they’re calling it, a “gramp stamp.” — Seth Meyers› In his victory speech after the New Hampshire primary, Donald Trump claimed the unemployment rate might actually be as high as 42 percent. He might be right, because Hillary just fired her entire campaign staff. — Jimmy Fallon› It’s been a rough week for Hillary, after Bernie Sanders won the New Hampshire primary by more than 20 points. Bernie said he’s always liked New Hampshire, especially cuz he was around when it was still Old Hampshire. — Jimmy Fallon› A Republican insider compared Marco Rubio’s debate performance to “looking at your iPhone and the video freezes and says it’s buffering.” After hearing this, Bernie Sanders said, “A what doing what?” — Conan O’Brien› Chris Christie announced yesterday that he’s dropping out of the presidential race. Christie said he’s not sure what he’ll do now, and then someone reminded him he’s still the governor of New Jersey. — Seth MeyersSource: www.newsmax.com