DEAR ABBY: We used to live in a neighborhood where my 13-year-old daughter’s best friend, “Mandy,” still lives. They would play together and visit often and are well-suited in maturity and personality. Since we moved, Mandy has been to our new home (five miles away) a dozen times.
The last several times we have invited her to come over, she has been unable to, which I completely understand. People are busy. But recently, I have received no response at all from her mother. Mandy was invited to my daughter’s sleepover, and I was not told whether she was coming or not. She didn’t.
My daughter is heartbroken, but I feel I have done all I can do to offer a chance for them to get together. I have emailed, texted, Facebooked and called and left a message. I emailed the mother asking if I had offended her, or if her daughter no longer wanted to be friends anymore. Mandy’s mom indicated there was no offense; they just have been super-busy. Our daughters email each other several times a week, so I think they still would like to be friends.
Clearly, I can’t force the woman to be more responsive, but how should I handle this? And what should I tell my daughter, who misses her friend so much? – NOT THAT FAR AWAY
DEAR NOT THAT FAR: Not knowing Mandy’s mother, I can’t render an opinion about whether she’s leveling with you about her schedule. She may be super-busy, experiencing family or health problems or simply not want to drive her daughter 10 miles for a play date. As I see it, you have no choice other than to let her know Mandy is always welcome.