DEAR ABBY: After many years, my sister and I finally have a decent relationship. I feel I can tell her about almost anything.
My brother-in-law, “Aaron,” is an alcoholic, and my sister enables him. When he drinks, his already quick temper becomes worse and he “knows everything.” To make things worse, they have a 3-year-old child I’ll call “Casey.” It infuriates me when I see Aaron’s crude, foul-mouthed, “omnipotent” behavior in front of Casey.
There have been times he has used my presence (because I babysit Casey) to drink to the point of impairment. When Casey has a tantrum or is overtired and acts her age, Aaron loses patience with her. He yells at her, slams things down in front of her and storms out.
Children watch and learn behavior from their parents. Daughters will seek out boys, then men who behave like their father, thinking it is normal behavior. How do I approach my sister?
My husband and I have a stable home and successfully raised five children. We would be willing to take in Casey until Aaron is truly well. My comments to my sister will be met with fury or maybe hatred, but I will do whatever is best for Casey. I love that little girl too much to see her raised in such a toxic environment. – BETWEEN A DRUNK AND A HARD PLACE