DEAR ABBY: About 10 years ago, I visited my oldest and dearest friend, who I see a few times a year. The last time, her husband, who I’ve also known for years and who I thought was a friend, started teasing me. I can take a joke, but the teasing got mean. Eventually he stopped, and I continued my visit.
I was really angry at him, but because I didn’t want to involve my friend, I sent him an email. I told him I thought his teasing went too far and to please not do it again. He never replied. Now when I visit my friend, her husband is never there. He stays away. I haven’t seen him in years.
My friend makes silly excuses why he isn’t at home when I visit. In fact, the last time I went I saw him driving away when I drove up! I don’t hold a grudge against the guy. I think it’s sad that he has to run away. Should I say something? — PERPLEXED IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR PERPLEXED: No. You dealt with your friend’s husband appropriately without involving his wife. Enjoy your visits with her, and do not drag her into this. I see no reason to raise the subject. Your problem is solved.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a gentleman who would like to date more than I do. I want to ask a woman in my church choir out for coffee or lunch on a Sunday afternoon. But I get so nervous I get knots in my stomach. I know dating is one of the things I need to leave in God’s hands and have His help in getting over the nerves.