DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have friends who are kind, intelligent and warm. However, as we have spent more time with them, “Phyllis'” compulsive talking has become a real problem for us. She hijacks whichever one of us is sitting next to her and starts a monologue that goes on and on.
Phyllis doesn’t even look at the person she’s talking to and doesn’t hear when you try to interject anything. She has said she’s hard of hearing and does wear a hearing aid, but I believe the problem is more than a hearing deficit.
The dilemma is they have booked a cruise with us. We didn’t ask them to, but when I mentioned we were going, they thought it would be fun. The thought of having dinner together every night and being subjected to this is going to put a distinct damper on what is a rare vacation for my husband and me. Is there any way to not offend them and have more give-and-take in the conversation? — DREADING IT IN OREGON
DEAR DREADING IT: You or your husband need to make clear to this couple well before the ship sets sail that you signed up for this cruise because you want to spend time alone together, meet new people and make new friends, which is why you will not be able to dine with them every night or participate in every activity with them. Period.
DEAR ABBY: My wife of 48 years recently died, and my stepson put some artificial flowers on her grave. I was surprised to see this when I visited on the eight-month anniversary of her death. Both my wife and I always considered artificial flowers tacky and not appropriate for cemeteries, even though lots of people decorate gravesites with them.