DEAR ABBY: I respectfully disagree with your response to “Woman’s wedding has been hijacked.” These mothers have no business trying to co-opt the bridal couple’s wedding. If the daughter gives in, it’s only the beginning of these two mothers trying to strong-arm themselves into trying to make future decisions for this poor couple.
The couple should put their feet down and tell these mothers to back off. It’s their wedding, the only one (hopefully) they’ll ever have, and, if they cave to these mothers’ incipient narcissism at the expense of their wedding plans, they’ll all regret it (including these mothers) for the rest of their lives. I’m truly surprised you didn’t tell the couple to stand their ground. — DON’T BACK DOWN
DEAR ABBY: Why should the bride put her hopes and dreams on the back burner just so the moms can impress their friends and associates? Not only does this advice fail to help the dad help his daughter, but it also sends the message to the daughter that her wedding is not really her wedding, it is a stage production the moms are orchestrating for their advantage. — THINK AGAIN
DEAR ABBY: The advice for the hijacked wedding plans should have been for the bride to tell these two mothers to let the bride plan the wedding of her dreams, not theirs. I am assuming the bride can afford to pay for her small wedding. She can still include these mothers in something special. — ONCE IN A LIFETIME
DEAR READERS: In the first line of my response to Doting Dad, I agreed that the daughter should have the wedding she wants. In retrospect, it’s clear I should have ended my answer there!