Top 10 other uses for the Apple iPad
(winning entries in online contest)
10. Crash site for iHippies.
9. No more costly bookmarks to purchase.
8. Use it as a flat hammer to destroy your Kindle.
7. Special app shows how much your property has been devalued in the past 12 months.
6. Pretend that you’re Mayor Bloomberg using an iPhone.
5. Portable tanning booth for John Boehne.
4. Keeps you occupied while waiting in line to buy next ridiculous Apple product.
3. The touchscreen is great for culturing strains of virulent bacteria.
2. Keep track of all the plot twists on “Lost” (extra memory required).
1. Moneymaking machine (Steve Jobs only).
Source: “Late Show With David Letterman”