As the holiday season approached this year and the stress of preparation dissipated somewhat, I started to get excited about my favorite part of Christmas and New Year’s. As an only child, especially as an only child living on my own for the first time this year, what I love and look forward to more than presents is family- and friend-time.
There are few things I love more than preparing for a Christmas party filled with good food and relaxed conversation. The buildup to Christmas, with its enhanced work obligations, greater traffic and the pressure to buy gifts on a limited budget is highly stressful, but when the week before Christmas rolls around and my vacation time approaches, a huge sense of relief sets in. I am thankful that my profession as a teacher allows me the time off to enjoy the last magical couple of weeks at the end of the year.
Once the first day of my vacation starts, I get this huge sense that everything is going to work out, and I almost enjoy going to the mall to find the last few gifts. This year was different from most years, however, because I have not been constantly with my immediate family. I have missed not being able to help decorate the Christmas tree and seeing my home neighborhood lit up with Christmas lights, but this time away from family has allowed more time with friends.
In college, holiday get-togethers were a stringent requirement. You hadn’t seen your high school friends in five months, and the world would end if you did not meet up with them. Part of this urgency was the need to gossip about new friends, to share new experiences and to relate to the same stressors we all seemed to share.
Now that I am out of college and don’t live in a world marked as much by the seasons and definite changes in time, it is tough getting together with my friends, even the ones I consider the closest. Sometimes the anxiety and self-reproach of not having seen them in a while makes me even more reluctant to make plans.
This Christmas, however, I found the time to reconnect. The experience of renourishing friendships has been extremely rewarding and, unexpectedly, the best gift of this holiday season. Our time together has not just been filled with small talk and catching up, but with sharing memories that remind me of who I am. The people who love me extend beyond family, and it becomes apparent through these memories that I either consider forgotten or that I assume others will not remember. These recollections also remind me that I am valuable, my friends are valuable, and together we have created a life worth remembering, worth retelling.
Even subtle memories are life-defining. A walk with a friend on the first day of spring can be just as memorable as seeing the Grand Canyon for the first time or a favorite band in concert. This year, instead of letting the days and hours sweep me away, I am going to make an effort to live and create memories in small moments. Joining with my family and my friends, it is possible to experience and cherish life through one step, one day and one memory.
Contact Corin Harpe at corinharpe@gmail.com.