In retrospect, the Labrador puppy may not have been the wisest choice.
Goldfish? Goldfish do not chew vital things to shreds. Nor to my knowledge do parakeets, gerbils, hamsters or even tarantulas, though that last option is one I rank somewhere just below a deranged clown on my favorite-things list.
Echo. That is the name of the four-legged destructobot that is now eating yard signs, bushes, hoses, tool handles, fence posts, trash can lids, pieces of siding and the occasional muffler off vehicles that have done her absolutely no harm. She was named by my daughter after Echo Sackett, the young heroine of the Louis L’Amour book “Ride the River.”
At first, the chewing was cute, as in “Awwww, look at the cute puppy gnaw a stick. Good puppy!” But then the mastication became ever more menacing. The latest battle has surrounded our “Shelby Alarm” yard sign. I am a huge believer in alarm systems and in signs advertising their presence to would-be nefarious characters.
The dog – now approximately 60 pounds – pulled the entire sign out of the ground, post and all. I came home to find her gnawing on it. I scolded her and pounded it back down in the ground. I know she understood me; the repentant look on her face sent a clear message of “I am so sorry, I love you more than Milk Bones, and I will never do it again, I promise.”