DEAR ABBY: My husband and I were chatting recently and the subject of sperm donation came up. He surprised me by saying he’s vehemently against it, and then compared it to selling your body as in prostitution. He also mentioned he thinks it’s disgusting because any kids we would potentially have might end up dating their half-siblings. We let the issue drop, but Abby, I have a secret.
In my early 20s, I participated in an egg donation program to support couples who were unable to get pregnant on their own. At the time, I didn’t think much about it. I didn’t want kids — and I doubt if I ever will — so I figured it was my contribution to the gene pool without having to raise little humans myself.
Author Jeanne Phillips, the daughter of the original advice columnist Dear Abby, poses for a photo in Los Angeles, Friday, Oct. 5, 2007.I never told my husband about it because it happened before we met. I do know that some of my eggs were successfully transplanted.
Should I tell my husband about my donations or keep quiet? — FERTILE MYRTLE
DEAR MYRTLE: The time to have spoken up was when your husband aired his feelings on the subject of sperm donation and infertility issues. You did a wonderful thing and with good reason. Your husband should be made aware of that, with no apologies.