Let’s handle our business.
As for the Rushmores, let’s go this way.
Rushmore of Willie Nelson songs (and we did songs he sang) — “My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys,” “Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain,” “Whiskey River,” “Angel Flying Too Close to the Ground.” This one was wicked tough.
Most beloved professional golfers not named Tiger — Arnie, John Daly, Fred Couples and Lee Trevino.
Rushmore of NBA players 6-foot-1 and under — Iverson, Tiny Archibald, Isiah Thomas, John Stockton.
Rushmore of Spurs — Clint’s clinking spurs in so many Westerns, Tim Duncan, Tottenham kickballers and the Iceman, George Gervin, because the poster was so wicked cool.
As for the rules, well, Paschall had some UT football goodness from this week’s Big Orange Caravan stop in the 423.
Also of note was the eye-popping news that the Chattanooga area had 65 all-state wrestling picks. And the final numbers for Signal Mountain’s JoJo Uhorchuk: 55-0 this year and finished his high school career 237-3. Wowser.
Let’s bag the ‘bag.
From Mark
If Brendan Sorsby knew the gambling issues were going to come out, say, a month ago, could he have declared for the draft and jumped ship from college? He’s got lots of practice at leaving schools. If possible, what are the chances the NFL adds him to a roster with the gambling history or is he untouchable?
Mark
A completely fair question, and one with multiple layers.
One, he would have had to declare for the draft several months ago, and there’s no way he was going to make more than the $4 million Texas Tech reportedly paid him on his rookie deal.
(Yes, that sentence feels strange to even type. Second-round-or-later picks likely make more in the portal than the draft process. Cats, dogs playing together.)
And here’s betting (Spy … huh?) that at draft declaration time, Sorsby did not feel he had a gambling problem. But regardless of the circumstances then, here’s hoping he gets it worked out with help.
Which leads us to his future.
As I wrote this week, the NCAA needs to drop the hammer (or as big a hammer as they have left at this point) if it is true that he bet on Indiana football when he was part of the Indiana football program.
In terms of his football future, well, considering that Deshaun Watson is in line to be the Cleveland Browns QB1, well, the Shield has consistently shown it has a forever leniency for human faults if you can play the game.
Sorsby should roll the dice and enter the summer’s supplementary draft after treatment.
Whether any team would take a chance on him will be quite telling. But it would be more an indictment on his ball abilities than his betting habits.
From James
Jay, I love your column. We read it every day.
(Question: Would you give my wife a shout out? She thinks you’re hilarious.)
I get most of your movie quotes but wonder if there are any TV shows you frequently use as a reference?
Thanks and you probably have more than you need, but if this made Friday’s mailbag that would be great.
James
First, good morning Mrs. James, and thanks for reading. Both of you.
I appreciate it more than I can express.
And that goes for all of you folks, regulars, newbies, random clickers and everyone in between.
My TV references are fewer and farther between. And way more selective. There are a slew of movies in the regular rotation, as most of you know.
And they run the gamut of genres.
As for TV shows, “Seinfeld” would assuredly be the MJ of that category. Especially in terms of frequency.
Think of the extreme range.
“Yada, yada, yada.”
“George is getting angry.”
“Anti-dentite.”
“No soup for you.”
“Not that there’s anything wrong with that.”
“That’s one magic loogie.”
Arguably the most used one would be Michael Scott’s “That’s what she said,” from “The Office.”
There also are a fair number of Andy Griffith lines mixed into my rotation.
“National potato week.”
“Nip it in the bud.”
“Citizens arrest. Citizens arrest.”
Not sure of many others, although I probably should try to write down Gibbs’ rules from the first 10 or so years of “NCIS” — which is high-quality rewatching.
What about everybody else? What’s your go-to quotable TV show?
From Mike
Jay, on the topic of the Lookouts, whatever happened to Frank Burke? He was instrumental in the previous stadium move and had a lot of skin in the game.
Mike
Great question, and in truth, I do not know.
And that may be a) by design of Frank, and b) a credit to Frank.
And know this, dude deserves a statue at whatever place the Lookouts call home now and forever. Up there with Old Man Engel, Frank Burke is on the Lookouts’ all-time Rushmore.
And remember, while he got a favorable lease from the city for the land, he paid for AT&T. And while the sun became a critical talking point for the pro-new stadium movement, I loved AT&T.
Bet I went to 15-plus games a year before the kids started playing stuff and I started coaching.
(Which also ended my golfing days, and it’s a trade I’d make every day and twice on Sundays. And as I write this and we are getting ready for my son’s senior awards banquet this morning, I wish we could go back and do it all over. Damn allergies.)
Some of our regulars will offer some details about Burke and his whereabouts these days, but I will always appreciate his presence in Chattanooga and wish him nothing but the best.
From Spy
Braves didn’t win (Monday) night. What? They didn’t play? Well, no wonder!
Kudos to the Rays sideline reporter for giving that young girl a ball after some (blank) cheese outwrestled her for a home run ball in the stands. For once, a sideline reporter served a purpose.
I’ll dip my toes in the current Jimmy Kimmel fiasco. As for the calls of “he was talking about Trump’s age” … bull (bleep). Yeah, Trump’s older. But dude doesn’t look like he’s headed toward a stay at Alexian anytime soon. Sure, our First Amendment allows Kimmel to say something outrageously provocative as “expectant widow.” By the flip side of that coin, we also get to call him “a no-talent (bleep) head.” I won’t call for ABC to fire him. Don’t give him the notoriety or the martyrdom he appears to crave desperately. I’m trying to think of a fitting punishment, but when his ratings are dog (bleep) anyway, let him keep screaming into the vacuum.
Spy
First, here’s the clip of the Tampa Bay baseball incident where the idiot who wrestled the ball away from a little girl and the Rays reporter making amends. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNFrxIm-b_U
The Braves are fun to watch. That bodes well for the summer, friends.
As for Trump v. Kimmell, I truly think I speak for a lot of folks and say my world will be better when they both fade away.
Have a great weekend, friends.