Survivors of gun violence, including people who’ve lost loved ones, gathered at the Avondale Community Center for an event honoring them.
There was painting, yoga and games for adults, and next door, children could enjoy crafts. Christy Rashed, with the Chattanooga chapter of the gun reform group Moms Demand Action, said she planned Saturday’s event to give survivors and their families some relaxation and comfort.
(READ MORE: ‘We are a violent culture’: Chattanooga leaders discuss gun violence, mental health)
“A lot of times, people leave children out of the grief,” Rashed said. “And children have grief and trauma.”
Many attendees were mothers who lost sons to gun violence. In many cases, they were killed by people they or their families knew and trusted, attendees said.
Cassandra Montgomery was shot in a domestic violence incident in 2008, and her son was shot and injured in 2014, she said. Now, working in a funeral home, she said she often sees mothers who have lost children to gun violence.
“I tell everybody, I’m not walking in a mom that raised a gangbanger, a robber, anything,” Montgomery said in an interview. “I’m walking in a mom that’s fixing to bury her baby. There’s a big difference.”
State Rep. Yusuf Hakeem, D-Chattanooga, attended the event and talked with survivors.
“In rooms like this, I can get concepts and ideas for bills to put forth into legislation,” Hakeem said.
‘Tragic for so many people’
In 2013, Sarita Burch lost her son, Christopher Jones Jr., in a shooting 10 days before his 25th birthday. Jones had two children, who Burch brought to Saturday’s event.
The shooter, who is now serving a 40-year sentence, was a family friend, Burch said.
“I considered them a part of my family,” she said Saturday. “So it’s a separation. It’s totally devastating, heart-wrenching pain not to be able to just see or interact with people that you were raised up with as family. It’s just tragic for so many people.”
(READ MORE: Two dead in separate shootings less than a mile from each other in Chattanooga)
Gun violence also affects the family of the perpetrator, Chattanooga police Sgt. Ernest Craw told the group Saturday.
“We got a lot of young people losing their lives to the grave, and to the jailhouse,” Craw said. “So our community is suffering on both ends.”
Staff photo by Matt Hamilton / Sgt. Ernest Craw, right, with the Chattanooga Police Department talks with attendees of a “Honor Our Survivors” event to honor survivors of gun violence in the Chattanooga area at the Avondale Community Center on Saturday, February 3, 2024.Burch said she forgave her son’s killer in court, crediting her faith in God.
“If you’re showing true love, true love remains through everything,” she said, “That’s just the way I feel about it. It’s not that it was a stranger. It was somebody I knew from his childhood up until he was an adult.”
‘Totally destroyed my family’
When Kisha Taylor’s son, Antonio, was shot and killed in his home in 2010, he was holding his 5-month-old son, Taylor said.
Antonio was 28, and raising his first child. At that age, he was already leading his family, Taylor said. The two share a birthday.
“It has totally destroyed my family,” she said in an interview Saturday. “But I am a fighter, I am feisty.”
Now, Taylor said, she puts most of her energy into her grandson, who just turned 14. She said she feels he was robbed of time with his father.
“I thank God that my son left that piece with me,” Taylor said.
There are good days and bad days, she said, and she still feels unbalanced without Antonio.
“Always keep people like myself in your prayers, because we still struggle day to day,” she said.
‘A party I didn’t want to be in’
Rashed lost her son, Jamal, in a 1994 shooting.
“At first, I did not consider myself a survivor,” Rashed said at the event. “I saw myself as a mother, and someone invited me to a party that I didn’t want to be in.”
Nearly 30 years after his death, Rashed can still rattle off her son’s achievements — participating in student government and the Black Achievers group at his school and playing multiple sports. He always dressed well, Rashed said, often wearing suits to class.
“He will never leave me,” Rashed said. “Jamal was just a bright spirit.”
Rashed first got involved with Moms Demand Action on the national level. When she attended a local meeting last year, she realized the group was largely made up of advocates and needed to bring in more survivors and people who had firsthand experience with gun violence. In-person events like Saturday’s are important to bring people together, she said.
Now, Rashed and her husband honor Jamal with a memorial scholarship. To date, it’s doled out more then $200,000 to hundreds of college-bound students, she said.
‘My son spoke to me’
After her son was killed, Louise Bell was ready to give up.
“I put a gun to my own head and wanted to blow my brains out,” she said. “But God spoke to me and said, ‘Nah. I got another purpose for you.’ My son spoke to me and said, ‘Nah, Mama.'”
Her other purpose was to be there for her daughter and grandchildren, including five left behind by her son, Bell said.
Aside her son’s death, Bell’s family has lost multiple other members to violence, including a nephew killed at a Chattanooga Amazon facility last year. Being a part of Moms Demand Action helped her find a support network and space to process, Bell said.
“The community has this pain that I have,” she said. “We have to learn to cope with it, but we’ll never get over it.”
Contact Ellen Gerst at egerst@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6319.