Two years ago, the U.S. Surgeon General raised concern about the epidemic of loneliness in our country. Nearly half of all adults reported feeling lonely. Of course, there’s been speculation about why loneliness has become such a burden in our society. Some blame technology, while others point to the “false intimacy” social media creates. Some even point to culture as the culprit, claiming fierce individualism and push for “success at all costs” has eroded our desire to build relationships and community. Whatever the cause of loneliness, the antidote remains the same: deep connection through healthy relationships.
So, how do we turn the tide on loneliness? It starts by understanding the need for relationships, specifically friendships. It turns out, lifelong friendships are not just nice to have; they’re vital for mental health. Studies show that close, enduring friendships are linked to lower rates of anxiety and depression, greater life satisfaction and even better physical health. In fact, a 2020 study published in Psychological Science found that people who prioritized friendships in their youth reported better mental health in midlife. The effects of these relationships go far beyond feel-good memories; they help us identify healthy habits and relationship skills we carry into adulthood.
Friendships are, in many ways, our training ground for life. Think about it: a strong friendship requires communication, empathy and conflict resolution — the same skills we need in marriages, workplaces and community relationships. Dr. Marisa Franco, psychologist and author of “Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — and Keep — Friends, explains that friendships teach us how to build trust and create emotional safety. They’re the first relationships where we learn to navigate differences and boundaries outside our family unit.
But here’s the kicker: Friendships also shape how we treat ourselves. A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that people with supportive friendships were more likely to engage in self-care and adopt healthier coping mechanisms. Simply put, good friends make us better people.
If friendships are so beneficial, why do some people seem to make friends effortlessly while others struggle? The answer lies partly in personality and partly in life circumstances. Extroverts, for example, tend to find it easier to meet people because they thrive on social interaction. But even introverts can cultivate deep friendships by leaning into one-on-one connections rather than large group settings.