published Thursday, August 8th, 2013

5-at-10: UT's Smith hurt, PGA contest entries, college football's best uniforms and NFL's best celebrations

We're moving quickly today because of a slew of work assignments that include but are not limited to our morning gig of writing a family-oriented, interweb-based sports column, our daytime gig of being a sports department employee, our afternoon gig talking sports with College Football Rainman, David Paschall, on Press Row from 1-3 p.m. on 105.1 FM and our all night gig of doing our high school preview magazine.

From the "Talks too much" studios, how's your momma and 'em?.

  • photo
    Former Ooltewah star Jacques Smith is one of 12 “player staff” leaders on the UT football team.
    Photo by Associated Press /Chattanooga Times Free Press.

Thumbs down — and SEC notes

Former Ooltewah star and UT senior defensive end Jacques Smith got the bad news that his broken thumb will sideline him 4-to-6 weeks.

Tough sledding all around there.

If Jacques misses the full six weeks that have been reported, that would have him doubtful for the Oregon game in Week 3.

We still believe Smith can deliver on his lofty expectations — and maybe he get to the (Cue Jaws) NATIONAL Football League — but this is yet another speed bump in a career of them for a kid we believed was going to be a super stud duck.

Side question: Which high-profile area high school football recruit went off to a FBS school and overachieved? Anyone?

———

OK, we're in — PGA Championship contest

Good luck to all the folks that entered the Almost a Major International Incident PGA Contest. Here's what we got:

5-at-10 — Woods, Stenson and Jason Day.

StuckinKent — Woods, Adam Scott, Justin Rose. (Late addition that, upon further review) had his entry in before you Ohbrother. Sorry.)

OhBrother — Woods, Scott, Rose.

Uch — Matsuyama, Mahan, McDowell (Unless of course Mahan's wife needs a back run or something — we're kidding, we're kidding)

Mrspud — Tiger, Scott, Donald

Harry Thornton — Mickelson, Manassero McDowell

Dawg747 — Mickelson, Poulter, Scott

Mrs. 5-at-10 — Mickelson, Scott, Rose

Fred — Woods, Tim Clark, Chris Wood

ThatIDoKnow — Zach Johnson, Stenson, Colsaerts

OTWatcher — Mickelson, Cabrera, Day

Tiger — Harris English, Scott, Westwood

McPell — Woods, Choi, Jason Day

Spy — Stricker, Charl, McDowell

B-i-B — Mickelson, YE Yang, Jaco Van Zyl

Mark P — Woods, Charl, Jason Day

SBBS — Woods, Westwood, Day

sportsfan — Phil, Scott, Jimenez

Dcrotty — Dufner, Scott, McIlroy

If we missed you, please let us know.

Here's what we believe — Tiger wins. We love the way he putted last week. We love the fact that for the first time since 2008 he seems comfortable being Tiger again. We love the way he's playing.

If Tiger is in contention Sunday, it becomes the biggest story in sports. We're hoping to watch it.

———

You're killing us Smalls

We had a fictional sports movie character update here Wednesday. Then news broke that Smalls, the new kid played by Tom Guiry around which The Sandlot guys rallied was arrested in Houston for head-butting a police officer in the face after Guiry was told he was too drunk to board an airplane.

This of course begs the question: How drunk do you have to be to be barred from boarding an airplane.

C'mon Smalls, we know you got the shaft wearing the plastic glove and that awful long hat. But dude, be better than that. What would Bennie say?

————

This and that

  • photo
    Atlanta Braves' Justin Upton, right, celebrates his home run with teammate Brian McCann against the Washington Nationals during the seventh inning of a baseball game on Wednesday, Aug. 7, 2013, in Washington.
    Photo by Associated Press /Chattanooga Times Free Press.

— The Braves have won 13 straight, and BJ Upton's Medoza buster is higher than Lil' Danny Struggla. Good times. Side note: The punk that is Bryce Harper, a day after admiring his homer in a loss and getting bent out of shape because he got what was coming to him, gets yanked for not running out a grounder. Clown move bro.

— Stupid lottery. Some folks in Minnesota and New Jersey won. What would you do if you had won the $400-million-plus jackpot?

— Hey, Johnny Football has not made bad headlines in the last 24 hours. Yay. Way to go Johnny. His dad is so proud he bought him a Range Rover.

— Auburn scrimmaged Wednesday and all the quarterbacks went live, meaning the defense got to hit the four Tigers trying to land the QB job. You want a working definition of a coach knowing he has a QB mess — Gus Malzahn seems OK if any of the four get injured in scrimmages. Great. A Darwinistic survival of the fittest test is hardly the ideal way to pick a starting QB in the SEC. Hello 6-6. Maybe.

— Most NFL preseason games have the drama of a Kim Kardashian off-Off-OFF Broadway one-act play. But with the latest injury on the offensive line, the Atlanta Falcons' preseason opener tonight against Cincy is pretty important. Also of particular import for area fav B.J. Coleman is the Green Bay-Arizona on Friday night.

— Somebody get Wes Welker a tissue.

———

Today's question(s)

As always feel free to chime in on any and the above topics and remember Friday's mailbag — we need a couple of entries.

Here are but two — and we are for sure going to discuss these on Press Row with Paschall.

Love Notre Dame or loathe them, that's well within your power. But we always though the classic Navy jerseys and Gold pants the immaculate Gold helmets were a great college uni. Now they are going all Oregon with a new look that is far from classy. Here's a slide show. Question: Who has the best uniforms in college football.

The NFL is tightening its celebration rules. Who were the best celebrating hot dogs in NFL history? T.O. may not be No. 1, but dude is definitely in the "Grab your popcorn" Rushmore, right?

about Jay Greeson...

Jay was named the Sports Editor of the Times Free Press in 2003 and started with the newspaper in May 2002 as the Deputy Sports Editor. He was born and raised in Smyrna, Ga., and graduated from Auburn University before starting his newspaper career in 1997 with the Newnan (Ga.) Times Herald. Stops in Clayton and Henry counties in Georgia and two years as the Sports Editor of the Marietta (Ga.) Daily Journal preceded Jay’s ...

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Comments do not represent the opinions of the Chattanooga Times Free Press, nor does it review every comment. Profanities, slurs and libelous remarks are prohibited. For more information you can view our Terms & Conditions and/or Ethics policy.
MocTastic said...

Don't forget TO changed the rule book when he whipped out that Sharpie and signed the football after scoring...

August 8, 2013 at 10:08 a.m.
JonathanMCook said...

Ironic you mentioning Popcorn-gate. Not only do I remember watching that game live (on TV) when it happened but a week or two later when ALL the Cowboys Pro Shops in various malls here were selling T-shirts with TO's image doin' the popcorn thing. ^^()

Regarding best looking jerseys, are we talking current or past designs? BTW, while ND's jerseys are borderline bad comedy, they at least don't look as bad as Georgia's WTF attire from the game with Smurf University.

If we're going present day, my picks are: A&M, Appy State, North Dakota State, North Texas, and Da Mocs*.

*Personally, jury is out on this minus the local bias as I would like to see the full set-up of white helmet, gold Power C, and blue jerseys.

Ugliest: Iowa State, Sam Houston State

August 8, 2013 at 10:33 a.m.
Buschleague said...

5-- I'm down with almost all of the uni changes (no camo though) across the landscape. 'Classic' just reeks of old school, antique leather chairs, b&w tv's, all the stuff we sports fans endured as kids. Change is good. Couldn't enter contest as my only pick is Tiger, I think he treats this field like white cloud and notches #80. In a past life I was escorted off a delta flight after boarding..I prolly didn't need that 15th Busch lite.

August 8, 2013 at 10:45 a.m.
JonathanMCook said...

BL- Agreed. And no more "holiday themed" jerseys (looking at you Tennessee). Back to Appy, I do like their new designs but NOT a fan of the Yoseff image on the helmets. The "A" was just fine. But in all fairness, the new ASU logo is not as nearly as "out there" as San Diego State's new helmet logo.

On a sidenote, and I'm being serious here, Spy, since you come from a prestigious line of GSU supporters, why is it the uniforms are modeled after Alabama's? Given the programs literal storied history, I imagine there is a backstory to it.

August 8, 2013 at 11:08 a.m.
mrspud said...

Busch...a man who can tolerate the taste of 15 Busch lite's proabably deserves to be escorted off! LOL. Just kidding, they all taste the same after the first 3 anyway.

Notre Dame's uniforms were fine just they way they were! WTH? (family interweb version). Next thing you know UT will have checkerboard helmets. Lord help me. Best uniform? Penn State home uniforms..simple and classic.

Celebration rules should be stricter in the NFL. If what is happening now after TD's isn't unsportsmanlike conduct, I don't know what is.

Is it Friday yet? Darn.

August 8, 2013 at 11:11 a.m.
jgreeson said...

MT —

TO's stuff was fun — well other than the run to the logo stuff.

We want to the game to be fun. It's fun right?

JMC —

Great call on how bad Georgia's unis against Boise. AWWWWW-ful

Busch Whacker —

Need has nothing to do with number of beers. You be the best you you can be and never the twain shall meet.

We're not against new unis just because they're new. There are a slew of Oregon's combos that ROCK. There also are a slew of Oregon's combos that make them look like the Fightin' Highlighters.

If new works, great. If it doesn't. Change just to change is as flawed an approach as "well, that's the way we've always done it."

Spud —

Thursday, Friday, Monday, Sunday...

They each end in 'y' which is close to why not have another?

Stay thirsty my friends.

August 8, 2013 at 11:36 a.m.
BIspy4 said...

As Erk once said, we couldn't afford stripes. More economics than anything else. The legend is that, after Georgia Southern dang near upset Florida State at home in 1988 (led 10-7 early in the fourth quarter), Burt Reynolds approached Erk and offered to buy GSU new unis. Erk said no. Shoot, Southern didn't even get names on the uniforms until 1997.

Best unis? Still love Auburn's road togs. Notre Dame's road unis - white jersey, gold pants, gold helmet, also look great. Do not like the new look at all. As unclassy as Brian Kelly is. Florida State's home unis also still look great. Always liked UCLA's road unis.

So what does Daddy Football do for a living where he can afford Johnny Paid-off a Range Rover? Because the champagne room just went over 500,000 miles and the Spy wouldn't mind some new wheels.

Maybe Wes Welker can tell his mommy to talk to the school board about mean Mr. Belichick in PE class. Looking back at it, maybe Gisele was on to something when she called out Wes after the last Super Bowl loss to the Giants. Wes, you're going home each night to a hot Hooters girl wife. Dry up.

August 8, 2013 at 11:39 a.m.
jgreeson said...

Spy —

Nice intel about GSU. Thanks for sharing.

Auburn's road white-on-whites are our favs, so there you go.

Daddy Football is the son (or possible grandson) of a Texas oil man, and all that implies.

The champagne room is still running? There are parts of Georgia that have put out an APB for that bootleggin' Chevy.

Which happens more: Struggla missing and groaning; Welker p---ing and moaning (F-O-I-B and all — suck it up dude). Belichick and Brady made a glorified Rudy into a Pro Bowl wide out. Why don't you stop talking for a while Champ.

August 8, 2013 at 11:51 a.m.
JonathanMCook said...

Spy-

Thanks for the intel. As well as earning me some respect points towards BR for offering that in the first place considering Florida State was his ala mater.

Class: more rare then a five leaf clover.

To tack on what Ten Ring stated, the Manziels are tied to family oil money but as Paul Manziel (the father) stated in an ESPN online article, "it's not Garth Brooks money". In other words, they're not the Hunts (real life Texas oil family here in Dallas who are about as close to the Ewings that can be imagined-literally). The father DOES work. He's in the car dealership business (coincidence? I think not) but doesn't say if it's a single independent dealership or a whole group. Either way, they are definitely in the six figure brick McMansion catagory if that makes any sense.

August 8, 2013 at 12:20 p.m.
BIspy4 said...

I think Erk also talked about the need to sell programs at the games, so the uniforms were kept simple with no names. What was it from "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance"? When the legend becomes fact, print the legend?

August 8, 2013 at 4:06 p.m.
BIspy4 said...

If this is true, be afraid, NBA. Be very afraid...

@KingJames

Watching 87 Finals between Lakers/Celtics. So much post work out there(Worthy, Jabaar, Magic, Bird, Parrish, McHale). Notes taking #Legends

August 8, 2013 at 4:20 p.m.
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