Greeson: In a presidential race this comical, why not Bill Clinton as Donald Trump's VP?

Jay Greeson
Jay Greeson
photo Jay Greeson

Well, as the Republican candidates drop, we are left with Donald Trump as the GOP nominee.

Who could have guessed that when this campaign started? Very, very few.

Now, after John Kasich and Ted Cruz have called it quits - and after spending well more than $150 million to lose to a spray-tanned reality star - one key question is, who will The Donald pick to be his running mate?

While he has said there's a 40 percent chance he'll pick someone who was among the small village of folks vying for the nomination, here are some other options:

- Donald Trump. We know they are the only two people who agree on everything he has said. Plus, he's got great hair, and we all know he's a winner.

- Clint Black. A country music star, who as a conservative plays well in the South. However, when Trump learns that simply being named Black does not count as being a minority, Clint will surely lose points.

- Curt Schilling. They have a lot of the same controversial views, and they each have questionable social media habits. Most importantly, they each have done their best work wearing a ball cap.

- Bill Clinton. This would really blow the hair back on the two groups Trump loves antagonizing the most. Reaching across party lines would leave the GOP establishment dumbfounded. Plus, picking Bill would mean Hillary would be running against the two men who have caused her the most angst ever.

- Clark Kent. Yes, he's a fictional character, but that's only a minor detail. In fact, before this election, Trump was borderline a fictional character. We know Trump likes muscles and winners, so who better than Superman, right? Since Kent works in the media as well, it would be a poke in the eye of the folks who simultaneously loathe Trump and have cemented his perch atop the GOP heap.

- Mark Cuban. Cuban, like Trump, is an eccentric billionaire, and one seems like more than enough on any ticket. Also of note was the fact that Cuban recently described Trump's presidential bid as the Seinfeld campaign - as in, like the famous sitcom, it's based on nothing.

Controversy doesn't love company

OK, we have had frequent discussions about the softening feelings and hiccup-quick protests popping up across college campuses.

These exercises in petulance have ranged from anti-Trump-in-chalk message protests at a slew of campuses, including UTC, to the faux racial nightmare at Missouri last fall.

Now comes the next chapter and verse for the Missouri leadership.

According to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch this week, the university announced Wednesday that freshman enrollment is down almost 1,500 from last year. It means Missouri likely will have a freshman class of fewer than 5,000 for the first time since 2007.

Sure, that could mean a lot of different things.

But, make no mistake, the faux racial outrage and the school's botched handling of the event played a part. Here's what Missouri spokesman Christian Basi told the Post-Dispatch:

"As we've been talking to prospective students and parents, we've been told the events of last fall have played a role in their decision-making process."

By any other name

We have become hyper-sensitive to the overarching use of language and the effects it has on certain groups.

More times than not, it simply comes down to common courtesy - something that we are in far too short a supply of these days.

In fact, if you don't want your momma hearing you say it, then you probably shouldn't be saying it.

That said, here's the latest reason a growing number of us are more and more befuddled by the back-bending efforts of the politically correct.

The United States Department of Justice has decided to no longer use terms like "felon" or "convict" because those are "disparaging labels," according to The Washington Times.

Instead, the DOJ will now use "person who committed a crime" and "individual who was incarcerated."

You can't make this stuff up, folks.

Today's stars

Yes, Sunday is their day, but certainly all of our moms deserve more than just 24 hours, right?

So let's spend the entire weekend honoring our moms, and the moms of our tots.

With that in mind, here's a top-five list of really bad Mother's Day gifts:

- Anything with a plug (trust me);

- A Hooter's gift card;

- A last-minute, hand-written pledge to do the dishes;

- A promise to let her have the remote for any hour of the next week that does not overlap with a Braves game;

- Vitamins or diet books.

Now that we have covered that, here's a Happy Mother's Day weekend to moms everywhere.

Contact Jay Greeson at jgreeson@timesfree press.com. His "Right to the Point" column runs Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.

Upcoming Events