5-at-10: All-Star spanking, NBA free agent frenzy and the 40-yard puzzle

5-at-10: All-Star spanking, NBA free agent frenzy and the 40-yard puzzle

July 11th, 2012 by Jay Greeson in Sports - Columns

We are moving quickly today because we have an early morning dentist appointment.?

From the "Talks too much" studios, here we go...?

American League's Matt Harrison, left, of the Texas Rangers, reacts after giving up runs as pitching coach Mike Maddux speaks with him during the fourth inning of the MLB All-Star baseball game, Tuesday, July 10, 2012, in Kansas City, Mo. (AP Photo/Jeff Roberson)

American League's Matt Harrison, left, of the Texas...

Photo by Associated Press /Times Free Press.

All-Star spanking

The All-Star game was a beat down, and it had nothing to do with the National League destroying the American League.?

No, we were beaten down by the on-and-on-and-on-and-on that is Tim McCarver. Sweet buckets of ear blood, that dude is brutal. And on the slowest days do the sports calendar, if Chris Berman is going to do Monday night's main event and McCarver was hogging the mic on Tuesday night's All-Star game, should we expect Carrot Top to be the emcee at tonight's Espys?

?Here's just one of the shining examples of McCarver's wisdom: "The National League has hit for the cycle in the first 2 2/3 innings." We were waiting for him to tell us the National League power group of Giants starters of Pablo Sandoval, Buster Posey, Matt Cain and MVP Melky Cabrera were four folks who had never been in McCarver's kitchen. Thanks Tim.?

Then, with the NL holding an 8-0 lead, McCarver and Joe Buck started discussing reasons for viewers to stick around. No thanks.? We had long since turned to the Auburn-Utah State replay on ESPNU (don't act like you didn't do it too).

In this Jan. 27, 2012, file photo, Dallas Mavericks' Jason Kidd (2) surveys the court in the first half of an NBA basketball game against the Utah Jazz in Dallas. It was believed Kidd would return to the Mavericks, especially after they missed out on Deron Williams. But ESPN.com reported Thursday July 5, 2012 that anonymous sources said that Kidd had decided instead to join the Knicks for a three-year deal worth about $9 million. (AP Photo/Tony Gutierrez, File)

In this Jan. 27, 2012, file photo, Dallas...

Photo by Associated Press /Times Free Press.

NBA free agent frenzy

NBA teams can make free agent acquisitions official today, and a slew of the big names will come rolling off the market on day one.

Two of the new developments have created a clear plan for two of the big-name franchises.

The Heat have agreed to terms with Rashard Lewis, another 3-point specialist. Lewis and Ray Allen will give Miami a couple of long-range gunners that will help spread the floor.

The Knicks agreed to terms with aging defensive-minded center Marcus Camby. New York will add Camby and Jason Kidd to a roster that is obviously gunning for gold at the 2014 Senior Olympics.

The 40-yard puzzle

Did you see UTC football ace John Frierson's interesting story on times in the 40-yard dash? Read it here http://www.timesfreepress.com/news/2012/jul/11/40-yard-times-key-but-inexact/.

There are some well-known myths out there. The Loch Ness monster. A compassionate Red Sox fan. Sasquatch (although the Jack Links Beef Jerky folks have all but proven his existence).

Here are the two biggest faux numbers in sports - 4.4 and 90, as in 4.4 40 times and 90 mph fastballs. Gang, they just don't happen very often. And know this, if someone says they run a 4.4 just smile and nod. It's the speed version of catching a fish - extend your hands - thiiiissssss big.

A 4.4 40 is flat trucking. Emmitt Smith ran in the 4.6s. So did former Alabama Heisman winner Mark Ingram. And neither of those guys were caught from behind very often. In fact, the 4.4 fallacy has distorted every speed rating. We think 4.4 is the flatline for fast when it's actually upper end fast. Sure the 4.3 and the very rare 4.2 guys are blurs.

And don't get us started on Uncle Mitchell's tricked up radar gun saying little Timmy is touching 90 with his fastball. After 30 years of spending springs and summers at ball parks across the South, want to know how we know if someone is throwing in the 90s? We listen. Fastballs in the 90s sound different, and when you hear it you know.

This and that

- Was it us or did about every third player that appeared in last night's All-Star game be a former Brave? And when did Melky Cabrera become Rod Carew??

- It was cool watching the All-Star game fans in K.C. give Chipper Jones a standing ovation before his pinch-hit single on Tuesday. In the grand scheme of things, the way Chipper has handled his retirement - announce it early and enjoy the ride - has been spot-on perfect.

- Congrats to Catherine Nelly, who will be inducted into the National High School Sports Hall of Fame tonight.

- And while there's not much to watch sports-wise on TV tonight, the Chattanooga Lookouts welcome Pensacola and Billy Hamilton to town. Sliding Billy Hamilton has 104 steals in roughly 80 minor league games so far this year and is arguably the fastest player in baseball. Here's saying Billy does run a 4.4 40. Earlier this year in a 0-0, Hamilton walked, stole second and third and scored on a fly out. To the second baseman. ?

Today's question

?One thing that was enjoyable about the All-Star game was the commercials.

The bits about the players were good and while some of the segues back into the broadcast were heavy-handed at times, it felt like we were watching the future of sports broadcasting/advertising in some ways. Plus there was a movie trailer for "The Campaign" with Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis in which those two clowns are running for office. (In the trailer, Ferrell tries to take a swing at someone who side-steps the punch and Ferrell ends up slugging a baby. This movie will either be hilarious or terrible - there is no in between.)

That said, the other commercial that got our eye was the new remake of "Total Recall" and that got us thinking (yes, Spy, that's a dangerous spot).

What is the Rushmore of movies that need to be remade? With the bevy of new effects and technology, "Total Recall" - which was way ahead of its time back then - could be boss.