From Nick
Hey, Mr. Fat and Stupid,
My buddies and I read the 5-at-10 like almost everyday and we love Press Row.
We were wondering who makes your Rushmore of best trash-talkers considering all the smack Conor and Floyd have been going back and forth with all week?
Thanks.
P.S. The hate mail part of Friday's mailbag is a great add on.
Nick -
Thanks for the kind words and for playing along with the craziness.
Before we get to your question, let's discuss the week that has been for Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather.
The first two days of this promotional circus in a lot of ways did some really positive things for the event.
We all concur for the most part that it's going to be a very long shot for McGregor to win this unless a) he lands a haymaker out of the blue and knocks Money out cold or b) snaps and goes MMA after three rounds of being unable to lay a glove on arguably the best defensive boxer of all time. (Side note: For those of us thinking that the latter option there could be in play, Showtime boxing reporter Stephen Espinoza confirmed earlier this week that McGregor will fork over a large and 'significant' financial penalty for any non-boxing attack in the fight. So there's that.)
But the first two days of the promotional tour created a great deal of interest and intrigue. Sure, it was part-WWE and part old-school boxing pep rally meets smack talk, and McGregor is a world-class smack talker. (Side note, part II: Why are people saying McGregor's comments of calling Floyd "boy" and telling him to "dance" are racially insensitive? Seriously? In a carnival this ludicrous, we are going to play the race card because one fool called another fool a boy? If we are talking about verbal injustices here, why is no one mentioning the 12 million cuss words each tossed, including several female insults? Amid all that, people actually think 'boy' is the worst thing McGregor said? In advance of an event that in truth is archaic to the gladiator days, somehow a racial issue jumps out as offensive. Man, we are misguided group some times.)
The first two stops got a lot of us thinking, "Man, maybe McGregor's passion and hatred and aggression could topple the odds and he could land a haymaker."
Well, Thursday's third round of this trash-talk fest turned into an unmitigated, unfunny mess that reminded all of us who were starting to wonder if maybe we would pony up $100 for this that this staged, contrived event is just the loud con job before the boring con job that will be this fight.
Side Rushmore: How about the "Rushmore of that friend who" during our teenage years of being a dude.
There was the Rushmore of that friend who got his driver's license first and already had a car; that friend who had the hot older sister because she had hot older friends; that friend whose parents always left town like every other weekend and you knew where the party was; and that friend whose dad would always buy the pay-per-view fight.
Thoughts, and for some of the female readers, is there a different list for your teenage friends who?
As for the Rushmore of smack talkers, we think McGregor has a strong case to be included in this but he's only fighting for the last spot.
One is Ali and he's far and away the far-left GOAT of the category. Two is Tyson, who offered some of these unbelievable golden nuggets of talk:
"I was gonna rip his heart out. I'm the best ever. I'm the most brutal and vicious, the most ruthless champion there has ever been. No one can stop me. Lennox is a conqueror? No! He's no Alexander! I'm Alexander! I'm the best ever. I'm Sonny Liston. I'm Jack Dempsey. There's never been anyone like me. I'm from their cloth. There is no one who can match me. My style is impetuous, my defense is impregnable, and I'm the ferocious. I want his heart! I want to eat his children! Praise be to Allah!"
"My power is discombobulating devastating. I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."
And of course
"Everyone has a plan 'till they get punched in the mouth."
We'll round out with Deion Sanders and Larry Bird, who gets the slightest of edges on Jordan and McGregor.
FILE - In this July 10, 2010 file photo, actor Dan Haggerty arrives at the premiere of the musical feature film "Standing Ovation" in Universal City, Calif. Haggerty, the rugged, bearded actor who starred in the film and TV series “The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams” about a mountain man and animal trainer, has died. Haggerty died Friday, Jan. 15, 2016, at Providence Saint Joseph Medical Center in Burbank, Calif., according to his manager, Terry Bomar. Haggerty was 74 and had been battling cancer of the spine. (AP Photo/Dan Steinberg, File) From Walt
Jay,
Is is true that several of those seriously bearded dudes in the MLB All-Star game were really Grizzly Adams and his sons
Walt -
We're not sure when the power beard became the look du jour of the young athletic dude.
We understand the NHL 'playoff beard' and all that comes with that.
But in baseball? Especially considering how hot it gets?
We can confirm Grizzly Adams was not at the MLB All-Star game. In fact, Dan Haggerty, the man who played Grizzly Adams, died of cancer in January of last year.
As for the rest, well, considering Haggerty had six kids, who knows, some of those all-stars may have some connection to the man we all remember as John "Grizzly" Adams.
New York Yankees' Aaron Judge shows the trophy after winning the MLB baseball All-Star Home Run Derby, Monday, July 10, 2017, in Miami. (AP Photo/Lynne Sladky) From Todd
Discussion and updates to your MLB predictions? I've included them here.
Thank You.
TC -
We have just pushed your recollections down a touch and will add some reaction to each pick accordingly.
AL
East - Boston (In first place, 3.5 games ahead of the Yankees and Rays)
Central - Indians (In first place, 2.5 games ahead of the Twins)
West - Houston (In first place, 16.5 games ahead of the Rangers and Angels)
Wildcards - Detroit and New York (currently the Yankees and Rays would be the wildcard teams)
ALDS winners - Boston and Cleveland (? - although Houston looks pretty awesome)
ALCS winner - Boston (?)
NL
East - Washington (In first place, 9.5 games over the Braves)
Central - Chicago (Tied for second place with St. Louis, 5.5 games behind the Brewers)
West - Dodgers (In first place, 7.5 games ahead of the Diamondbacks)
Wildcards - St. Louis and San Francisco (Uh, the wildcard teams right now would be Arizona and Colorado and the Giants are the worst team in the NL not named Philadelphia. Ugh.)
NLDS winner - Los Angeles and Chicago (? - but L.A. looks mighty strong)
NLCS winner - Los Angeles
World Series winner - Boston (?)
AL MVP - Mookie Betts, Boston (Right now it would be either Aaron Judge or one of the monster bats from the slugging firm of Altuve, Springer and Correa in the top half of the Houston lineup. Still Betts has 16 homers, 53 RBIs and 15 steals. Despite slumping a touch in average, Betts' 4.3 wins against replacement ranks fourth in the AL - behind Judge, Correa and Altuve.)
AL Cy Young - Chris Sale, Boston (This one is very much in contention. Sales has been a lock down ace for a first-place club.)
AL Rookie of the year - Andrew Benintendi, Boston (While no one saw the Judge train doing the monster things he's doing, Benintendi has been pretty dog gone good for the Red Sox. He's hitting .279 with 12 homers, 51 RBIs and nine steals and that's stout. It's just nothing close to Judge.)
AL Manager of the year - A.J. Hinch, Houston (We're good here.)
NL MVP - Corey Seager, L.A. (His numbers are strong - .298, 13 homers and 45 RBIs - at the games most demanding position. But a couple of things. First, Paul Goldschmidt is having a monster season with Arizona. Second, you could make an argument that Seager is no better than fourth in the MVP voting on his own team behind Kershaw, Justin Turner and Cody Bellinger.)
NL Cy Young - Clayton Kershaw, L.A. (Yep.)
Rookie of the Year - Dansby Swanson, Atlanta (Nope. This has to be Bellinger in a runaway.)
NL Manager of the year - Bruce Bocky, San Francisco (Not sure which is worse, this pick or the way I spelled his name back in March.)
From Nathan
Jay, has interleague play killed the all star game? I always looked forward to the all star game growing up to see Nolan Ryan vs Tony Gwynn type matchups. Now that's gone with all the interleague, which I like, but I think it's cost the all star game.
Also hoping for a sizzling batch of Friday hate mail!.
Nathan -
In some ways yes, that has hurt the appeal of the game.
Here's the biggest thing: The romance of baseball and our younger days are gone.
That can't be overlooked. Thing of it this way. When I was a kid, I'm pretty sure I could name the lineup of every National League team. Heck, we're pretty sure we could imitate the batting style of each member of the Braves, Reds, Astros, Cardinals and Dodgers from like '77 to '82 during our all-day-long whiffle ball games.
A lot of this from baseball cards, which are pretty much dead to kids these days.
This is not a "Get off our porch" rant as much as the way that exposure and the internet has changed everything.
Yes, interleague can carry a little of the blame, but with MLB network and online replays condensed to 9 minutes and SportsCenter highlights every night, the longing to see the great players of lesser-profile teams is not a concern any more.
Yes, the Gwynn-Ryan match-up carries the banner of nostalgia in this, but really, other than the first inning, did we see that, even back in the day. Heck, the most famous All-Star at-bat of my childhood was Atlee Hammacker vs. Fred Lynn, not exactly two salivating names of 1983.
Baseball
This day in history and Rushmores
July 14 is Bastille Day in France across the pond so there's that. (And sorry Stewwie, we have not paid Wimbledon a lick of attention this week. So it goes. That said, "Go Sam. Go 'Merica!")
Also, on July 14, the first U.S> Federal tax on states comes in 1798, and man, government does take a bite.
In 1914, the first patent for a liquid-fueled rocket design was granted to Robert Goddard.
In 1934, Babe Ruth hit is 700th career home run. Man, imagine how unbreakable that record appeared back then. Know this: The previous home-run record holder before Ruth took it over and reset the mark with each dinger was Roger Connor, who hit 138 homers and had the record for 23 years before Ruth passed it. Ruth passed that mark during the 1920 season and at the end of the 1930 season a decade later, Ruth had 565 career homers, almost 300 more than second-place Rogers Hornsby.
On this day in 1946, Dr. Spock's "Baby & Child Care" book is published.
On this day in 1951, the first color telecast of a sporting event takes place as CBS shows a horse race.
On this day in 1969, the $500, $1,000, $5,000 and the $10,000 bills are withdrawn from circulation.
On this day in 1985, the last USFL game was played as Baltimore beat Oakland 28-24.
On this day 30 years ago the Rookie of the Year trophy was renamed for Jackie Robinson, which seems fitting.
On this day in 2008, "The Dark Knight" premiered in New York City. That was a boss movie friends.
As for birthdays, well William Hanna of Hanna-Barbera - they brought us Tom and Jerry and Scooby Doo - was born today in 1910. Gerald Ford would have turned 104 today. Jackie Earle Haley, who was Kelly Leake in center for the Chico's Bail Bonds Bears, is 56 today. Robin Ventura is 50 today and somewhere Nolan Ryan is thinking, "You still want some, punk?" Former Auburn great and Braves all-star Tim Hudson is 42 today. (Tim Hudson, Hall of Famer? Discuss.)
Rushmore of Harrison Ford movies: This one is tough as all get out. Dude has a lot of options, and like we did with Sly last week, we'll have to do Harrison Ford roles, because this simply could be Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back, Force Awakens and the first Indiana Jones. So Rushmore of Harrison Ford characters, and dude has some all-timers, Han Solo, Indiana Jones, Dr. Richard Kimball and Dr. Jack Ryan. Happy 75 Harrison, you are movie star's movie star, sir.
Rushmore of Alexander: Alexander the Great, because as one reader said, it's not Alexander the very good or Alexander the better than average. Dude was pretty clearly great. Alexander Graham Bell makes it. Alexander Hamilton and Jason Alexander (George Costanza) edges Lamar Alexander. Sorry Senator.
Rushmore of dues who pull off baldness: Yul Brenner, the OG of the category, Patrick Stewart, The Rock and Michael Jordan (And if we were going to do the baldness peninsula with the hair around the sides, we'd go Finebaum, Captain Stubing from Love Boat, George Costanza and Jim Furyk, who ages 20 years when he removes his hat after a round.)
Rushmore of best modern-day (post 1980): Barry Bonds, Ken Griffey Jr., Tony Gwynn and and this is where it gets sticky. You could have Ichiro here. Or Manny Ramirez. Or Vlad Guerrero. Mike Trout is well on his way to it. There are the 1980s-90s Hall of Famers like Andre Dawson and Tim Raines. We'll go Rickey Henderson for the final spot, edging Ichiro and Vlad.
Hate Mail
As for the growing enjoyment of the hate mail people are now sending in, well, this week we had a few options. Enjoy, and let's have a vote on which one is the best crafted.
No. 1 (on Signal Mountain schools) -
Of course you don't want to look for ways to help the rest of the county. You only care about your kids and Signal Mountain because you are a snob and a rich jack$%@.
(Uh, gang, we worked at a newspaper. We can assure we are not a "rich jack$%@." A "jack$%@" maybe, but certainly not a rich one.)
No. 2 on Varnell -
Nice article, but you forget where one of those 5 officers killed a delivery guy and another one hit another car pulling an illegal U-turn, equaling a total settlement of around a million dollars. So 40% of their police force are actually unfit to drive, let alone arrest people. Get off your high horse, not every town needs a local police force.
(Getting closer.)
No. 3 on Varnell as well -
What do you know about Varnell? Not a damn thing.
We don't need you Chattanooga (bleeps) telling us how to live our life down here.
(Bleep) off Liberal Media.
Good talk gang.