LISA DENTON: Barry, before I tell you what I'm looking at doing this week, I need to tell you what I'm working on for October.
It has come to my attention that during Oktoberfest in Ooltewah on Oct. 3, among the beer and the brats and the Bavarian bands, is a longest beard contest. Before you tell me this is not a contest for the fairer sex, you should know that the other day I actually heard a woman say, "I meant to shave my chin before I left."
BARRY COURTER: I'll take "Things Overheard at the Walmart" for $100, Alex.
Lisa Denton and Barry Courter
LISA: Apparently there's hope for women of a certain age to generate hair on their chinny-chin-chins. I'm not sure I've reached that age, so I'll probably look more like Justin Bieber than Uncle Sy, but who knows what I might accomplish.
Speaking of manly facial hair, Hutton & Smith, the new brewery on M.L. King Boulevard, is having another Bond Movie Night on Tuesday. This week they'll be showing "Thunderball" with Sean Connery. I think he might actually be clean-shaven in this 1965 film, but I like to think of him with the white beard he wears now.
BARRY: My beer-snob friends tell me that Hutton & Smith has one of the finest craft beers in town, and perhaps in the whole region, with their IPA.
If you've never been there, it's an unusual space. To say it is completely dedicated to all things beer would be a colossal understatement. There are big brewing vats for making beer, a walk-in cooler, a mechanism for getting the beer into a 16-ounce can and a bar for serving you a beer. That's it. It's like beer heaven for the serious lovers of hops and barley.
LISA: I don't know much about hops and barley, but I'm thinking about writing a guide to motorcycle romance called "Bops and Harley." Not that I've done anything like that. I just think it would be a good book title.
You were saying?
BARRY: Part of the fun on Tuesday with the "Thunderball" screening could be looking for all of the moments or lines in the film that were "borrowed" by the Austin Powers films. Like holding the world ransom for $100 million.
LISA: Also, Austin Powers' hairy chest is based on Connery's, but Connery didn't have to glue his on.
Note to the in-house Web monitors: My Google search for "Sean Connery hairy chest" on company time was all in the interest of this column.
BARRY: Research, Lisa, it's research. The IT guys are going to love the Butcher Babies videos I had to watch to prep for an interview to advance their concert here in September.
Speaking of shows coming to town, Blues Traveler is at Track 29 on Tuesday night, and Saturday night is packed full with good stuff. Ryan Oyer Band is holding a CD release party at The Camp House, while Samantha Fish is the Riverfront Nights headliner. The same night, Robbie Fulks is at Barking Legs, and Cowboy Mouth returns to town for the Tech Town Mardi Gras Party on Broad Street. Cupid, of "Cupid Shuffle" fame, is there also.
LISA: And National Bow Tie Day, of all things, is Friday. I'll probably keep my celebration low-key - maybe just have a bowl of farfalle pasta. It's probably not a good idea for me to start sporting bow ties and chin hair.
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Contact Lisa Denton at ldenton@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6281. Contact Barry Courter at bcourter@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6354.