Hey, I hope you had a great Labor Day.
But it's hard to fathom you had a better Labor Day than Dustin Jonson. The PGA Tour hot shot capped a wire-to-wire win over the best in golf at East Lake to wrap up the Fed Ex Cup.
So, DJ's Monday checklist was play an elite course — and play it well. Check. Win $15 million. Check. All-but-wrap-up PGA Tour player of the year honors. Check. Celebrate afterward with Paulina Gretzky. Check.
We have long said that DJ's best is as good if not better than any other player anywhere. Yes, Rory is right there too, but this playoff version of Johnson has been overwhelming.
The numbers and analytics could make an Phi Kappa Beta from MIT's calculator melt, but there are two things to recall. (Well, three if you count lovely Miss Gretzky.)
One, DJ's 21-footer for par on 14 clinched the tournament, and had the speed bullet putt not rattled home it was going to be a 10-footer coming back for bogey. At that time, DJ had a two shot lead, and if he had gone bogey or worse, it would have set the stage for the only player in golf who can consistently beat DJ.
And that's DJ.
Second, and this is a big picture look at the way the sport has changed in terms of purses and prize money as well as DJ's efficiency. Sure, most folks who watched a fair amount of the fairways Monday knows DJ was at least one win in each of the last 14 seasons.
That kind of success and coin attracts attention from fans like Miss Gretzky.
But try this on for size. In his career, DJ has made $67,593,176.00, and that is without the $15 million annuity he received for winning this weekend. Only Tiger and Phil have won more in earnings.
But here's the kicker: DJ has averaged more than $71,750 per round in his PGA career. That's right, every time DJ heads to the course for a day at the 'office' he's averaged $71,754.96 per round, which of course is $3,986 and change per hole.
Oh my. (And Miss Gretzky.)
Who's with me
As eternal college role model John Blutarsky famously asked, "Who's with me?"
(Germans? Forget it, he's rolling.)
OK, in a effort to have a little more interaction with you guys and gals, and to make the most of whatever live sports we have in front of us for as long as they are in front of us, we are committed to a suicide pool.
Yes, the name is arguably the worst possible avenue, because despite sharing its name with an awful act that ends too many lives and wrecks countless others.
So let's figure out a new name, shall we? I think we shall.
Swimming pool is taken. So is office pool. Pocket pool. never mind. Kiddie pool. Yeah, again. (Side question: Hey Spy has the restraining order that keeps you from church groups and the Chuckie E Cheese expired?)
Picks pool is too easy. Yes a lot of folks call them eliminator pools and the name works.
But you know we can't go easy or predictable.
Let's go with the Intimidator Pool, with all props to all-time fav Dale Earnhardt Sr. Again, as Bluto asked, "Who's with me?"
The rules are simple. Pick one weekly NFL winner. No point spread, just a winner.
Give me a winner Vassily. One winner only please.
Now for the tricks. Once you pick a team, they are dead to you. Pick the Chiefs this week, and that's the only time you get to take Mahomes and his Mahomies.
And once you miss, you're out. For good. And that includes forgetting to enter any week too. You have to win — One winner only — every week to advance.
Feel free to give me your team in the comments or send me an email at email@example.com. It don't cost nothin' and we'll come up with some sort of prize for the winner.
Who's with me?
Tuesday in the kitchen
Well, technically it was not in the kitchen as much as from the kitchen.
And, while we likely will have to find a new Co-Op next year — the charges and allegations against the dude that owns Signal Mountain Farms are no es bueno and downright scary, friends — I would 100 percent do it again next season.
One of the great benefits from this has been to force me from my kitchen comfort zone.
We had family in town for the 5-at-10 III's 13th birthday. And because his food wheel starts, circles and stops on pizza, he was perfectly content with reheated Domino's. (Side tip here: If you have a cast iron skillet, reheat the pizza there. Trust me on this. It takes a little longer, but the crust is crispy and the pizza hot. Microwave is the last option and an oven reheat is OK, but the cast iron skillet is aces. So is a girdle too.)
So, with the fire pit humming — the weather was a winner this weekend too — we did hobo packets.
Some of you are nodding and saying, "That's old hat fat face." Well, it was our first spin with Hobo Packets.
Make large hamburger patties — you can split packets between folks depending on your fire space — and do not use the super lean ground beef because you do not want to dry them out.
In the vegetable base of the Hobo Packet we pealed and sliced some potatoes, a bell pepper and a sweet Italian pepper and thinly sliced some onions. We mixed the veggies together in just a smidge of olive oil.
Place the veggies evenly on a sheet of aluminum foil. I added one tomato slice in each packet because in addition to the great flavor, the tomato helps keep everything moist.
I top the veggies with some garlic salt, some black pepper and light Italian seasoning. Then place the hamburger patty in the middle and double wrap the concoction with foil.
Place the packet in the hot coals and let it sit for 40 or so minutes. If the fire is too big — the flames will consume the whole kit and caboodle — you can do it on the grill or even in the oven.
But if that happens, you rightly can't call it a Hobo Packet, though.
This and that
— You know the drill. Here's Paschall on Georgia DB Tyson Campbell looking for a big junior season. Here's Paschall on Alabama's next five-star superstar running back ready to Roll.
— The New York Giants are reportedly cutting ties with Deandre Baker, and friends there is really only one reason to drop a first-rounder this quickly. Baker was charged with armed robbery four months ago, and since the news is coming a few days before the season starts, well, here's betting the Giants got some new intel on the details of said crime.
— Well that didn't take long. Less than 10 days into the college season — and less than 10 games into the college season — and Southern Miss coach Jay Hopson has resigned after the Golden Eagles got whipped by South Alabama on Saturday. Yes, the optics of a home loss to open your fifth season in Hattiesburg are dreadful. But this feels like it had way more to do with Hopson's head-banging with school leadership, which included Hopson trying to hire Art Briles a couple of years ago.
— Speaking of college football, the Oklahoma State-Tulsa opener has been pushed back a week. Maybe there was an OA News that Coach Gundy needed to watch. (Actually, the Corona came calling in the Tulsa program.)
— Speaking of golf, well, Harris English capped an outstanding 2020 season with a late charge Monday that included five birdies on his final 11 holes to tie for12th at East Lake. Considering the check size — he won $682,500 for sharing 12th friends — English's season total was several hundred dollars short of $3.3 million this year.
— I hate this decision for a lot of reasons but the Tuscaloosa mayor is reopening bars around the University of Alabama. I understand the reasoning economically, because shutting down a college town in the summer hurts but it's not crippling. Shutting down the restaurants and such during the fall semester redirects the entire local economy. (Side note: The mayor of Chapel Hill, another college town teetering between Corona choices and economic ruin, shares more on the subject here.)
True or false it's Tuesday after all.
True or false, you're going to play in the Intimidator Pool.
True or false, with 23 career wins and one major, DJ is a Hall of Famer if he retired tomorrow.
True or false, with that lone major DJ has underachieved.
True or false, only people over the age of 40 recognize the term 'Hobo.'
True or false, the term 'Hobo' is not politically correct in this day and age.
As for me, well, it's neither true nor false that I'm taking the Eagles over the Redskins this week as my Intimidator Pick. (It's mostly true, but not official just yet.)
Thoughts, and you know the drill — answer some T or F, leave some T or F.
As for today, Sept. 8, let's review.
On this day in 1986, "The Oprah Winfrey Show" debuted nationally. We can all agree that Winfrey is the far left on the Oprah Rushmore right?
On this day 60 years ago, Psycho was released nationwide.
"Star Trek" with Shatner and Nimoy debuted on this day in 1966.
On this day in 1504, Michelangelo's Statue of David was unveiled in Florence.
Rushmore of statues. Go.