Picks a' comin'
It was a tough start. A bagel-and-4 last Saturday put us behind the postseason 8-ball. Amazingly, we have hit our last three, but we did not choose those for publication so they are of no use in our collective hunt for entertainment that is the college football season.
That's right. There are kids 18-22 playing for glory, hundreds of thousands of dollars in free education and tens of millions of dollars for their coaches, schools and programs. They are breaking their bodies and without hyperbole, risking years of their lives in the pursuit.
And a huge chunk of the folks forking over the coin or producing the eye-balls to generate the TV numbers (more on that in a moment) are doing so because they have money on the line.
Without more than a little trepidation, we have made another pass at the Fab 4 picks, bowl edition round II. (Of course, after a 1-4 start that included some bitterness in responses from people who assuredly were not entertained, you could have called last week's offerings the Fab 4 picks, No. 2 in the bowl edition. So there's that.)
We hate to do this but we're going to have to finish our picks and post them - no later than noon - in the comments. Deal? Deal. Hey crazy morning with some great questions.
Giddy-up.
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From "Scott"
Jay, I started reading the 5-at-10 this football season because I love you guys on Press Row. You make the ride home fly by. Thanks for that.
My question would be why have you guys stopped doing Rushmores there but you keep doing them here?
One more, and this is for my friend, how long should you be dating someone before you bring them to Christmas?
You guys are awesome. Thanks.
"Scott" -
Since "Scott" was asking for "a friend" we decided to put him in our cone of anonymity. (Sounds like something a fancy way Superman would describe the old-school phone booth - and you whipper snappers wondering what a phone booth is can get off my lawn after you turn down that loud Rock-n-Roll music - the "cone of anonymity.")
Anyhoo, as for the question from "a friend" well, that's tricky. And fair to wonder.
First, if your friend has not already made it know to his family, this year is a no go. Whether he's a teenager or in his 20s or he (or she for that matter) is no longer married and back out there meeting people, we are three days from Christmas and it's completely not right to hear a knock on the door and surprise, "Here's my new significant other Merry Christmas." It's not fair to your family and it's completely not fair to the significant others.
Trust us, the family is going to find things to get testy about this holiday season. It's our families and the holidays. That's how it goes. (And the older we get the more and more we believe that the most truthful single holiday advice out there comes from Clark Griswold's dad when asked about how he made all of Clark's Christmas memories so great. "I had a lot of help from Jack Daniels," Grandpa Griswold said. Amen and pass the Co-Colas.)
So if this is a surprise it has to be cancelled ASAP if at all possible.
As for a couple of reminders in this regard: The first meeting needs to be something far less stressful and formal and intimidating as a family holiday celebration. Start with immediate family and a dinner. Extend that to bigger family and informal places.
Most of all be honest and do not turn this into the "Meeting the Parents" crossed with "Gift of the Magi" because there are a lot of folks out there who are fine being in relationships with distance.
And to be frank - or even to be Jay - the time will be made pretty clear when you can bring the person you're dating to Christmas. For one, people in your family will be asking if they are coming because they want to get them a gift.
Deal? Deal.
As for the Rushmore, well, we have been asked that before and we love having them sporadically because we know they are very popular. But we also know that during football season especially there's a ton to get to and three hours in the South in the fall can fly by.
Also, there's the Chick-Fil-A principle at work here too. The Chick-Fil-A principle is our version of the negative impacts of over-supplying a hungry demand. It certainly has a more fancy business-school name somewhere, but we were sick the day we studied business at Auburn.
We call it the Chick-Fil-A principle because, well, we all love Chick-Fil-A, right? Well not the people with peanut allegories, but we have even heard some people we know who hate their CFA's politics say that doesn't matter because their sammiches are so good.
But if you had CFA every single day, after a while it's just another sammich, if that makes sense.
Great question and thanks for playing along, here and on the radio.
These seems like the best time to honor this week's obligations.
Rushmores for the week:
Rushmore of worst Christmas presents: Underwear, Fruit cakes, ties, Coffee products and mugs. (Hey if Starbucks wants to sponsor the 5-at-10 scratch that, we don't want their money if Folgers wants to sponsor the 5-at-10, great. We'll adjust. But gang, if you are in an office group in which coffee mugs and fruitcakes are acceptable entries into the gift pile, then just stop the exchange. Truthfully, it's more of a hassle at that point than a holiday tradition. Do something different. Everyone make their best desert or change the culture of the game and make everyone draw a name from someone in the office and write an anonymous paragraph about that person that everyone everyone appreciates. Think of the Michael Scott-type of The Office possibilities here friends.)
Rushmore of Christmas characters: Traditional: Santa, Rudolph, Santa's elves, Frosty. Literature: Scrooge, The Grinch, Tiny Tim and the Nutcracker. Movies and TV: George Bailey, Virginia (as in yes, Virgnia, there is a Santa Claus), Ralphie, and John McClane. (This list needs a few more because there is Emmett Otter - and his jug band - as well as Mr. Hinkie the Christmas Poo.)
Rushmore of worst Christmas songs: Santa Baby, I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (and while we are here, let's end the Christmas porn catalog can we, and that also includes "Baby It's Cold Outside" which is growing closer and closer to recounting an unfortunate sexual assault scenario at Christmas time), and yes, that stupid Hippo Christmas song, and the one about the Christmas donkey. (Yes, the first 12 million times I heard Grandma Got Runover by a Reindeer was more than enough, too.)
Rushmore of Spielberg movies (gang this one is tough): Jaws, Schindler's List, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Jurassic Park (because that leaves off some heavyweights like Saving Private Ryan, Close Encouters, E.T., and several others)
On this day Ted Cruz turns 47. Man it's hard to believe I'm older than Ted Cruz. Speaking of Schindler's List, Ralph Fiennes is 55. Diane Sawyer is 72. June Cleaver would have been 102 today. The Gibb twins Maurice and Robin were born on this day in 1949.
As for our NFL picks. Well, we need to make sure we find the perfect foursome to continue the greatest string of 2-and-2s since Noah lined up the animals.
Seriously, we have been 2-2 for the almost two months - no lie - and we're now 29-30-1 on the season on NFL picks.
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From Back-up QB (aka June Jones)
Jay,
Really enjoying reading the 5@10. Figured I ought to play along. If you have room for Friday's Mailbag, I've got two questions for you.
So as I was ready to settle in and watch the NFL 'game of the year' to decide the #1 seed and home-field advantage for the AFC Playoffs, I searched the guide to only find the "Nashville Tits" (short for Titans) versus the Niners! I could not find the Patriots-Steelers game on (cable) television! You've often commented that 2017 NFL television viewership is way down. How could it be that the 'game of the year' was not a national broadcast??? Why were we forced to watch Nashville (as a long-time die-hard Johnny Vols fan, I refuse to call the 'Tits" the Tennessee Titans – every time someone says 'Tennessee' and 'Football' in the same sentence, I perk up only to be let down that it is not the Big Orange they are referencing) instead of Pats-Steelers? I get the whole regional thing, but is that decision made by local affiliates? (maybe the more important question is: why am I still watching Comcast? Yes, I've seen the hilarious - but overplayed - DirecTV commercials about those of us still watching cable. Let's just say a family member is employed there and we're a loyal bunch.)
I did view (briefly) the SMU debacle Wednesday night. Why in the world would SMU put Sonny Dykes on the field when he had only been hired a week (or so) earlier? Has there ever been a 'worse look' for a coaching debut? Jimbo Fisher (and 99% of other newly hired coaches) is going to be sitting in a luxury box watching A&M in their bowl game. He'll do a sideline interview at some point and regardless of the play on the field, he'll "win." If the team looks bad, the 'knight in shining armor' is standing by idly waiting to rescue the Aggies if the team looks good, he's ready to build on the momentum from the bowl win. Either way, he looks good. But, SMU and Sonny Dikes did not. Why would SMU allow the new guy to coach someone else's team in the bowl game?
Merry Christmas.
Back-up QB (aka June Jones) -
We say this knowing we are not tipping our hand on who JJ is, but let me say to all the faithful and diligent and hard-working and difference-making people that work for the schools in and around our county - especially those doing it in the classroom and in various extracurricular activities - please accept my personal thanks.
I have seen a lot of you work, be it coaching, teaching, working, caring, you name it, and it makes sending my two kids to Hamilton County schools a relief because of people like you.
You are greatly appreciated June Jones. Even if Jerry Glanville thought you stunk. (Kidding. Mostly.)
Anyhoo, love the angle of the NFL game of the year, and you are so right. Among the many things the NFL is fighting, keeping the national game of the year hidden is crazy. Especially give the way last Sunday worked. Hey we get the old-school "black-out-rules" when the Titans or the Falcons are at home and it is not a sell-out then TVs within a certain distance will not show the game.
That makes sense.
But keeping the Steelers-Pats from a large part of the state of Tennessee is silly. Here's an idea: Put that thing on the NFL Network in the state of Tennessee and Northern California (where Johnny 49ers Fan is getting the broadcast).
Yes, the NFL Network can not and should not compete with the broadcast partners because those broadcast partners are forking over billions to fund the league and it's almost 11-figure annual revenue.
And in the 97-percent of the country that has the Steelers-Pats on CBS, go to regular programming. But these decisions are made on the local, not the corporate level. WDEF chose the Titans game rather than the Steelers-Pats game (and here's betting that the folks that made that decision wanted either the Steelers or the Patriots to go on a 43-7-type-of-smoking).
And that's their prerogative. But if the NFL gave them the out of having their local cake and eating the national game of the year too, here's betting the local affliates would be tickled. (As for your anatomical references to our NFL team to the West, well, thank you for the Christmas laugh. Ho-Ho-Ho wait. Strike that.)
Great call on the SMU thing, and that was a complete and total debacle. What was he doing? And to be honest if Sonny was going to get in there and act like he was doing something then get in there and do something. Dykes has a pretty stellar offensive background and there's simply no way he could have done any worse than the kid they turned the play-calling over to. Sweet buckets that guy was a GA before Tuesday night, and they let him call the plays.
(And gang, here's a suggestion on doing at least a little bit of research on these games before hand. Knowing that a GA was going to make his play-calling debut really helped us rebound in the entertainment category from the bagel-and-4 start.)
And one more point, JJ, the complete debacle of Sonny being involved was made even worse by how the game played out.
SMU quarterback Ben Hicks had a great sophomore season. He had 32 TDs and only nine picks and threw for more than 3,400 yards in 12 games.
He was terrible - three picks, two of them returned for TDs - and whether that was nerves in front of the new man or not is unknown.
I guess the only way it could have been worse is if Dykes had pulled Hicks before halftime, right.
Merry Christmas JJ and to all the teachers and coaches out there.
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From Mr. & Mrs. Readers
Love your A2 column. Makes my day to pick it up and read it.
My wife and I started reading the 5-at-10 because of it, and you have an amazing skill to write how so many of us actually talk and think.
Thank you for that and have a truly happy Christmas.
As for my question, and this is my first entry to your weekly mailbag, so if it is too long, I am sorry.
I read your Christmas gifts for local persons of note this week, and it made me laugh out loud. (My wife concurs that Mayor Coppinger has a really nice mustache.) Does Santa 5-at-10 have any suggestions for proper gifts for people in the sports world.
Thanks and keep up the fine work.
Mr. Readers -
Thank you, sir and ma'am, for such kind words. We were almost embarrassed to share the first part of that, but hey, since a week or so ago, we shared that someone thinks I'm a rectal pore, well at least two TFP regulars have my back. (Wait, my back and rectal pore in the same sentence Ugh. Can't we all just get along?)
Anyhoo, first things first: There's simply no way this writer can ever criticize some for sending in something that is too long. Simply no way since it would top out on the hypocritical chart to the place of somewhere between Derek Jeter's anti-Robin Hood of robbing from the poor Marlins and giving him to his beloved Yankees and the modern uproar about the attempts at influence by a foreign government in a U.S. election when there likely has been no fewer than 10 elections the U.S. government has covertly or indirectly influence through history and no one said a word about those.
Where were we? Ah yes, making Stewwie smile. Merry Christmas my good man. As for the A2 column Mr. Readers referenced, it is here.
As for your request, kind sir, I am happy to oblige.
For Tennessee football fans, may Jeremy Pruitt be the hero you need, crave and even deserve. The most ardent Tennessee haters around still will reluctantly admit that Saturdays in the fall are more fun when the Big Orange is relevant. Next year will be a challenge (neutral site vs. a tough West Virginia in the opener, a coin-flip vs. rebuilding Florida, a trip to Georgia, a trip to Auburn, Alabama in Knoxville and a trip to South Carolina are six of the first eight tests), but here's hoping that Pruitt puts together a meaningful and impactful class for this time next year. (Think top 5, Johnny Vols Fans.) And figures out a way to steal a win against any of the above schools not named Auburn.
For Braves fans, may you have the patience to continue to believe, the funds to attend a game at the new part (it's pretty sweet), and the wherewithal to attend the Hall of Fame induction ceremony this August when Chipper gets in. Because if you missed the ones with Glavine, Maddux, Smoltz and Cox, well gang, it's going to be a long time before another Braves player gets the nod. At least until Danny Struggla's on the ballot. (Side note: all the feedback from the Hall of Fame spreadsheet you guys have sent has been awesome. And yes, we think Crime Dog McGriff has a better case than most realize, he just has not had that media champion banging his drum. Where's Tom Emansky, and his fundamental video?)
For NFL fans, may you enjoy the peak of your game, because that's where we are. Yes, the NFL is still the most watched show, and its comps vs. other sports is staggering. (The NBA is bragging about monster increases to 1.8 ratings during the week; the NFL does five times that for the Pro Bowl for Pete Maravich's sake. Along those lines, here's betting a lot of the NFL brass are giggling more than a little about the rescheduled Sunday night game of Pittsburgh-Houston that instead of being on Christmas Eve will be Monday afternoon right in the middle of the NBA marathon. And the eye balls will not eve be remotely close.) Still, the trends are undeniable, and blame them on whatever you would like, but the downward turns in numbers are undeniable. We think there are a lot of things working against the NFL, and we know too many people, like my dad, who have boycotted watching the league all year because of the protests to even pretend that's not part of this.
For LeBron James, may you get to one more Game 7 against the Warriors with the game on the line and the ball in your hands. You will likely pass it because it would be the smart basketball play, but here's hoping we get to watch it at least one more time. (And while we know some around these parts want him to fail - hi again Stewwie - we also know most of you know how we'd want that to turn out.)
For baseball in general, may the Shohei Ohtani work. May the Dodgers and Yankees be the class of your league. May the Cards return to doing Cards things, the Cubs keep doing the new-Cubs things and may the Red Sox find some pitching. Baseball needs its high-profile franchises like no other sport. Even with the emerging stars like Trout and Harper, guys like Giancarlo Stanton can get lost in Miami. But let the Yankees trout out Gardner-Judge-Stanton to lead off a Sunday night game facing Ohtani and his 100-mph heater and then you've got something.
For Tiger Woods, may you have one more Sunday afternoon in the major championship late-afternoon sunshine. Oh what a "Tiger-in-the-hunt-at-Augusta" storyline would do.
For the Johnny Mocs Fans, may you keep these coaches in the major sports (we'll go football, hoops of both genders and wrestling for starters) for the next three-plus years. We believe all of them have great skills and will succeed.
For sports fans in general, may you find something that means as much to you as watching high school football does to me. It rejuvenates my appreciation for sports - and all the reasons we love sports - in a fundamental sense each and every week.
(I know we'll have some more to add - and you can feel free to play along too - but we are long on letters and short on time. Giddy-up.)
Finally for the regular readers of my column, the regulars around the 5-at-10, and the regular listeners of the show we do with David Paschall and Wells, thanks for being there. It means more than you know, and your support and feedback (and we were going to have a very Christmas-y Press Row today) means more than you know and makes it as fun as it seems.
Merry Christmas friends. And thank you.